A Blast Into the Past & the Next Generation!
by gdahs
Summary: Next Gen! After James, Al, Lily, Rose, Hugo and Teddy accidently break a time-turner, they are transported to Harry's 5th year. Watch as they struggle to not give their identities away to Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny so they will still be born. To not change the future much, as James tries to get the girl, Teddy meets his parents and to not get discovered by voldemort x
1. Letters

**Letters**

_(I've pretended that they found some way to bring albus dumbledore and Snape back to life somehow alright people)_

James Sirius Potter was in the headmistresses office... again for pulling another prank, he thought it would be funny to enchant all the suits off armour to follow all the slytherins and sing "the loser song" and he also set off dung bombs in the corrider scaring mrs norris to death jumping at filch and scratching him like hell

"So" McGonagall said

"So" James replied

"You do realize your actions you did today Mr. Potter"

"What actions?" James said, acting stupidly

"Your actions off today, suits off armour, dung bombs, mrs norris, filch getting scratched to death by the cat"

"I dont know what your talking about" James said trying to look innocent

"I think you do know, i mean what is wrong with the potter generation, i mean honestly, you are far worser then your father and grandfather put together!"

James grinned making mcgonagall to glare at him

"I shall be writing your parents tonight again, since detentions seem to be doing nothing"

"Which parent? Mum or dad?"

"I said parents which means both of them"

"_Oh hopefully Dad will get the letter and hide it from Mum, since Dad doesn't really do anything"_ James muttered

"What was that, Potter?

"Nothing, nothing, nothing" James said cooly

"You may now leave"

James stood up and left the McGonnagall's office

Proffesor McGonagall sat in her chair, dipped her quil in in and wrote

_Dear Mr and Mrs Potter,_

_Your son James Sirius Potter has once again caused a disruption in the school, i've written so many letters to you that it has become a collection, he has broken the school record of trouble in his 4th year, whilst the maurders James Potter and Sirius Black in all their 7years are no where near caused the amount of trouble your son has. In all my years of teaching i never thought this was possible... i have given up now being formal in all my letter so please forgive me, so here goes..._

_Dear Harry and Ginny Potter,_

_Please controll your son, he has a talent for getting into trouble, hopefully you can do something, I mean in his 1st year in this school after the christmas holidays, when he and his friend Rory Pattinson missed the school train, (even worser then Harry's 2nd year when you drove to school in a flying car with Ronald Weasley and crashed into the womping willow)they decided to ride flying motorbikes, drive to school into them crashed down a wall and cheer and wave screaming at the top of their voices and got in a fight with Scorpious Malfoy causing an even worser disrupruption in the school hall causing them to to the hospital wing_

_And that is just one of the examples in his FIRST YEAR! Over the years he has got into trouble for worser things and more constantly! Please do something!_

_Here is a list your son James Sirius Potter, which i told him to write the things he must not do but you get the gist of it: this the the works he wrote so here it is enclosed with my letter_

**Things I must not do! by James S. Potter**

_1) I must not sing "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmasters office and especially not with house elves as background dancers_

_2) I must not ask Proffesor Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick_

_3) I must not make light saber sounds with my wand_

_4) I must not give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convinces him they're real animals_

_5) I must not refer the Accio charm as "The Force"_

_6) I must not charm the suits of amour to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast_

_7) I must not declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day"_

_8) I must not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it on Halloween or other times_

_9) Whenever people ask me if I'm "Sirius" I must not reply by saying "Why yes, actually I am"_

_10) I must not always questions students"Are you fucking Sirius"_

_11) I must refer to Professor Dumbledore as 'Professor', 'Headmaster' or 'Sir', not 'Dude', 'My Liege' or 'Tim the Enchanter', "Santa" or"Gandalf"_

_12) I must not scream, "PINK CATS" at the top of my lungs at random moments, and stare at Proffesor McGonagall_

_13) I must not cut/charm students of Syltherin's hair_

_14) I must not throw kitty balls at Proffesor Mcgonagall since her animagous form is a cat_

_15) I will not charm the armor to sing loudly at ungodly hours_

_16) I will not talk like Yoda or a Chav_

_17) I must not rap_

_18) I must not sing the Santa Clause song every time Dumbledore enters a room_

_19) I must not send Proffesor Snape blood flavored lollypops._

_20) I must not buy shampoo for Proffesor Snape for Christmas or other occasions_

_21) I am not a Pinball Wizard._

_22) I will not greet Professor McGonagall with "What's new, pussycat?"_

_23) "Liften Separatis Crotchum" is not a real spell_

_24) Professor Flitwick does not wish to be addressed as "Admiral Naismith"._

_25) Sirius Black did not found the Sirius Cybernetics Corp._

_26) My name is not Captain Subtext_

_27) I cannot Hadoken anything into oblivion_

_28) Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda._

_29) Using the Engorgio charm on certain parts of the human anatomy is not permitted on school grounds, not even for entertainment purposes._

_30) I shall stop referring the Hufflepuff's as "cannon fodder"_

_31) I will not impersonate the Swedish Chef in Potions class_

_32) I will not blow up peoples cauldrons in Potions Class_

_33) I will stop argueing with Scorpous Malfoy_

_34) I will stop joking to Rose that her room is like a library_

_35) I will not adress 1st years as "midgets"_

_36) I shall stop attempting to make Proffoser Snape to laugh_

_37) I shall stop pranking people_

_38) I shall stop asking out Jenny Skater_

_39) I shall stop calling Proffesor Snape "greasy haired git"_

_40) I shall not abuse my power of being Harry Potters son_

_41) I shall stop sneaking out at night to places such as Hogsmeade_

_42) I shall stop falling asleep during class_

_43) I shall not talk back to teachers_

_44) I shall not get drunk during school days and burst in lessons laughing my head off, wobbling around the place or having alcohol on you_

_45) I shall stop purchasing "Weasely Wizarding Products"_

_46) I shall stop taking the mick out of divination_

_47) I shall stop spreading romours_

_48) I shall stop telling everyone Proffesor Snape is in love with Minerva Mcgonagal_

_49) I shall stop calling Proffessor McGonagal "Minnie"_

_50) I am not allowed to lock Rory Pattinson and Teddy Lupin in a closet to see if gay sex will occur_

_51) A time turner is not a flux capacitator, and I should therefore not install one in any Muggle cars_

_52) I will not claim my X-Files tapes are "Auror Training Videos"_

_53) When being interrogated by a member of the staff, I am not to wave my hand and announce, "These are not the droids you are looking for"_

_54) I am not a member of the Spanish Inquisition_

_55) I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintballing._

_56) I will not teach the house elves to impersonate Jar Jar Binks_

_57) I shall stop playing Grand Theft Auto and ask random people to join me_

_58) I will not sing The Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin Quidditch matches._

_59) I will not tell first years that Moon Prism Power is a basic Transfiguration spell_

_60) I will not yell "Believe it… or not!" after any of Dumbledore's speeches_

_61) Bringing fortune cookies to Divination class does not count for extra credit_

_62) Proffesor Dumbledore is not Gandalf_

_63) I shall not sing the entire Multiplication Rock series during Arithmancy exams._

_64) I shall not call Professor McGonagall "McGoogles"_

_65) I am not allowed to reenact famous battles of the Revolutionary War in the charms corridor._

_66) I am not allowed to begin each Herbology class by singing the theme song to "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes"_

_67) I will not organize a Hogwarts Fight Club._

_68) The Whomping Willow is not an Entwife_

_69) I will not hold my wand in the air before casting spells and shout "I have the power!"_

_70) I am not allowed to set up a first-year on a blind date with Moaning Myrtle_

_71) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Ball_

_72) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it_

_73) The Restricted Section is restricted for a reason_

_74) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways_

_75) I shall not camp in the Forbiden Forest_

_76) I will not make,"OMGWTF" a spell_

_77) It is not necessary to yell, "BAMF!" every time someone Apparates_

_78) I will not poke Hufflepuff's with spoons, nor shall I insist that their colors indicate that they're "covered in bee's"_

_79) If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw on their face or a dark mark on their arm_

_80) I will not start every potion's class by asking Proffesor Snape if the potion is acceptable as a sexual lubricant_

_81) Gryffindor Courage does not come in bottles labeled, "Firewhiskey"_

_82) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet_

_83) "To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice_

_84) I must not put bows in Rory's hair_

_85) When Albus or Rose is in the library I must not jump out from behind bookshelves, just to see him jump_

_86) I shall not give Proffesor Snape dating tips_

_87) I shall not convince the first years to build tree houses in the Whomping Willow_

_88) I shall not convince Lily that Snape secretly wants him_

_89) The Forbidden Forest is forbidden for a reason._

_90) I am allowed to have a toad, rat, cat, or owl. I am not allowed to have a reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or piranha._

_91) I will stop asking the Arithmancy teacher what the square root of -1 is._

_92) I will not change the password to the prefects' bath to "Makes getting clean almost as much fun as getting dirty"._

_93) There is no such thing as an Invisibility Thong._

_94) Asking "How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense?" and walking away is only funny the first time._

_95) I shall not offer to prepare tandoori owl._

_96) I shall stop asking when we will learn to make "Love Potion Number Nine"._

_97) There is no such thing as a were-thylacine._

_98) Tricking the schoolhouse elf into stripping does not mean they are now mine even if I yell "Pwned!"_

_99) I shall stop smashing down walls_

_100) I will not claim Chick Tracts are an accurate presentation of Muggle life._

_101) "42″ is not the answer to every question to the O.W.L.'s_

_102) I will not teach the first-years to sing "A Wizard's Staff Has A Knob On The End"._

_103) I will not go to meals dressed as Choda Boy_

_104) I shall not organise a "Harry Potter Fanclub"_

_105) I am not the Defense Against the Boring Classes Professor_

_106) A wand is for magic only, it is not for picking noses, playing snooker, or drumming on desks, no matter how bored I become._

_107) Novelty or holiday themed ties are not to be worn with my school uniform._

_108) I shall not put books of muggle fairy tales in the history section of the library_

_109) I shall not use Slytherin and Gryffindor first years as Christmas decorations_

_110) If asked in class what the Avada Kedavra curse does, yelling "It does DEATH!" may be correct but it is not the manner in which one should answer_

_111) Ravenclaw's or anyone shall not find a sign saying, "The library is closed for and indefinite time period" amusing in any sense_

_112) I will not follow potions instructions in reverse order just to see what happens_

_113) My name is not "The Dark Lord Happy-Pants" and I am not allowed to sign my papers as such._

_114) There is no such thing as the Chamber of Double Secret Probation _

_115) I will not attempt to magically animate my marshmallow Peeps._

_116) I am not allowed to introduce myself to the first years as Tim the Enchanter_

_117) I will not try and start Naked Thursdays for the ladies in the Common Room._

_118) The Ravenclaws are not "Mentals in training"._

_119) I am not allowed to use silencing charms on my Professors._

_120) I shall not attempt to recreate the Key to Time in Transfiguration class_

_121) I shall not draw moustaches on the headmaster portraits_

_122) I shall not flick things at Rose as she tries to study_

_123) There is not now, nor has there ever been, a fifth House at Hogwarts, and I am not a member of that house, nor am I its founder._

_124) I shall not teach the first years to play "The Penis Game" in the Great Hall during dinner _

_125) I shall not shriek whenever Proffessor Snape enters a room_

_126) I shall not ask any centaur about its mating habits._

_127) I shall not start food fights in the Great Hall_

_128) I shall not scare the Arithmancy students with Evens' Calculus book._

_129) "Y'all check this-here shit out!" is not an appropriate way to announce that you are about to perform an experimental spell_

_130) Getting everyone in the Great Hall to do the Time Warp will not earn me any house points_

_131) Growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is not "an extra credit project for Herbology_

_131) "I've heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge._

_132) I am not allowed to attempt to breed a liger._

_133) I will not go to class skyclad_

_134) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write "I told you I was hardcore"._

_135) I will stop referring to showering as "giving Moaning Myrtle an eyeful"._

_136) Starting a betting pool on the fate of this year's Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky, not a clever money-making concept_

_137) Adding the name "Bueller" to Professor Binns' roster is not funny._

_138) "Springtime for Voldemort" is not an acceptable suggestion for the class play_

_139)I will not refer to the Weasley twins as "bookends"._

_140) I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class._

_141) I am not to refer to the Potions classroom as "Kitchen Stadium"._

_142) I am not a tribble Animagus._

_144)I do not weigh the same as a duck_

_145) I am not being repressed._

_146) Calling Lucius Malfoy "Luscious Mouthful" is just plain gross._

_147) It is a bad idea to tell Professor Snape he takes himself too seriously._

_148) Sir Cadogan is not one of the knights who say "NI"._

_149) I will not take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter_

_150) Making rumors about Harry and Draco's secret love life is not funny and it will stop soon._

_151) I will not point to the Dark Mark in the sky and shout "To the Batmobile, Robin!"_

_152) I will not put a paper sign on Firenze's back saying "Pony Rides: 3 Sickles"._

_153) I will not ask Harry Potter who died and made him the boss._

_154) I must not point to Harry Potter's scar and ask if his Voldy senses are tingling._

_155) I will not attempt to magically animate my marshmallow peeps._

_156) I will not lock the Gryffindors and Slytherins in a room and take bets on who will come out alive._

_157) I will not use the phrase "Dude, get a life" around ex-death eaters_

_158) Putting a snitch in Malfoy's pants really isn't all that funny. Even if it does make him scream like a girl._

_159) I should not confess to crimes that happened before I was born, even if I have access to a time turner._

_160) I will not jump up in the middle of a Order or DA meeting, and yell , "VOLDERMORT, RUN!"_

_161) I will not tell Snape he needs to go to his "Happy place"_

_162) "Swish and flick" is only a wand movement_

_163) No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.  
>164)I am not a sloth Animagus<em>

_165) I am not to Owl copies of the Evil Overlord list to suspected Death Eaters._

_166) Nor can I cast Ice 9 or Ultima._

_167) I will not sweep the Gryffindor common room with Harry Potter's prized Firebolt_

_168) I will not refer to the hippogryph as "Horseybird_

_169) I will not replace Professor Snape's pumpkin juice with Skele-Gro._

_170) I will not swap Draco's broom with one out of Filch's broom cupboard._

_171) It is generally accepted that Cats and Dragons cannot interbreed and I should not attempt to disprove this theory, no matter how wicked the result would be._

_172) Crucifixes do not ward off Slytherins, and I should not test that._

_173) Professor Snape does not enjoy being called "Snookums"._

_174) Dumbledore is not Santa, he does not wish for me to sit on his knee and demand presents, especially not in June._

_175) When given a directive by my house prefect, I should not insist that "we don't need no stinking badges."  
><em> 

_176) I will not suggest that Professor Trelawney is "talking out of her arse."_

_177) I will not tell the Muggleborn first-years that the Forbidden Forest's real name is Mirkwood._

_178) When applying for a post at the Ministry of Magic after graduation, I should not cite "Fred and George Weasley" as my greatest influence at Hogwarts, putting down "Lord Voldemort" is probably not best either._

_179) I am not allowed to ink my owl's feet, have it walk across a parchment, and sell the result as cheat sheets for Ancient Runes, even though Crabbe and Goyle keep falling for it._

_180) A Muggle "vacuum cleaner" is not acceptable Quidditch equipment, even if it has been enchanted to fly._

_181) Hogsmeade village is not "a wretched hive of scum and villainy."_

_182) Sending rings to the nine senior faculty at Yuletide, with the return address "Voldemort", is not funny._

_183) I will not tell Professor Trelawney that I prophesied her death._

_184) I will also not tell Professor Trelawney that I had a vision of her killing the Dark Lord._

_185) I will not refer to Professor McGonagall as Catwoman, no matter how funny she would look in tight leather, nor will I ask her if she is Catwoman in disguise._

_186) I am to stop asking Professor Snape to Ball._

_187) I will not use Slytherin and Gryffindor first years as Christmas decorations._

_188) Calling Professor Flitwick "Willow" and asking him about Madmartigan is not an appropriate question for classtime._

_189) Portable Swamps are not funny. _

_190) Despite popular belief, Hufflepuffs are not soft and squishy. Do not treat them as such._

_191) No part of the school uniform is edible and I am not allowed to make any part of the school uniform edible. _

_192) Not allowed to prophesy the end of the world more than once. _

_193) The Giant Squid is not to be referred to as 'my lord Cthulhu', nor am I allowed to sacrifice first years to it on the new moon._

_194) I will not attempt to set up a mobile phone mast on the Astronomy Tower or the satellite dish._

_195) I will stop sending Professor Snape forged love notes that appear to be from Professor McGonnagall_

_196) Luna Lovegood does not have pointed ears, nor is she to be addressed as 'Galadriel' _

_197) Lucius Malfoy also does not have pointed ears, nor is he to be addressed as 'Haldir'._

_198) Professor Snape definitely does not have pointed ears, and under no circumstances is he to be addressed as 'Spock'._

_199) Robes are appropriate school wear. Bathrobes are not._

_200) The fact that there are only three unforgivable curses does not mean that every other curse is "pretty much forgivable"._

_201) I am not allowed to scare the first-years by screaming "I'm melting! I'm meeeeeeeeeeeltiiing!" while they are in the showers._

_202) I am not allowed to say "Bless you" every time someone mentions Quidditch._

_203) Enchanting the Sorting Hat to sort new students into the House of Martok, or any other Klingon house is forbidden._

_204) When called upon in class, I shall not insist that the correct answer to everything is '42'._

_205) Asking Professor Snape if a house ever fell on his sister is wrong. and so is asking him where he keeps his flying monkeys and if I could touch them._

_206) I cannot be a Heffalump animagus._

_207) I cannot insist that a dead parrot is my familiar - even if he is nailed to his perch and pinin' for the fjords._

_208) Professor Snape's proper given name is not Princess Silvermoon Fairywing GlimmerMcSparkles._

_209) There is no such thing as the "Hufflepuff Marshmallow Man",even if I do conjure him up._

_210) Do not... I repeat do not sing "Baby Got Back" when Firenze walks by._

_211) Regardless of the beautiful irony, I will not hang a tempting piñata from the Whomping Willow._

_212) The song "Ding Dong, The Witch is Dead" is never, ever appropriate._

_213) I will not write "Wizard" on my hat in sequins._

_214) I am not allowed to ask Pureblood students things like, "If your parents got divorced, would they still be brother and sister?"_

_215) I will not attempt to graft a transplant from the Whomping Willow onto the Hogwarts Christmas Tree in Herbology class._

_216) I will stop pasting happy face stickers on Proffesor Snape's office door._

_217) I cannot get credit in Ancient Runes for knowing BASIC, no matter how long it's been in use._

_218) I will not attempt to magically animate my marshmallow Peeps. _

_219) I do not get any flying monkeys when I graduate. _

_220) Every time I see a dementor, I will not go, "Ssssssssshire...Bagginsssss"or "The Shire/Frodo is That Way!"_

_221) Every time I see Kreacher I will not say something about 'master' or 'Precioussssss'._

_222) Every time I see Dumbledore, I will not say, "You will not pass!"_

_223) The boggart's first name is not Humphrey._

_224) I will not replace any ingredient in the potions classroom with new Folger's crystals._

_225) "Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo" is not a transfiguration spell._

_226) I will not add 'according to the prophecy' at the end of my sentences to raise my Divination grade._

_227) "Oo ee, oo ah ah, ting tang, walla walla bing bang" is not an actual spell._

_228) Not allowed to dress exactly like Snape and ask him to call me "mini me."_

_229) There is no Interpretive Dance course offered at Hogwarts, and I should stop signing up for it every year._

_230) I will not taunt Professor Flitwick by singing "The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins"._

_231) Proffesor Snape does not want bleach, laundry detergent, or new underwear for his birthday or Christmas._

_232) I will stop sending Professor Sprout love notes signed "N.L"._

_233) I will not try to make a new basilisk for the Chamber of Secrets._

_234) Murmuring "I see dead people… " every time I see one of the ghosts is stupid and was never funny. _

_235) Making a slinky go from the top of the astronomy tower to the ground level is not an appropriate pastime_

_-especially while singing "everyone loves a slinky"_

_ "everyone loves a slinky" until the slinky hits the bottom._

_- or especially while singing "everyone loves a slinky" until the slinky hits the bottom and starting the whole process over again whenever the slinky gets stuck._

_- apparently, not everyone loves a slinky. _

_236) Yelling "to infinity, and BEYOND!" was only funny the first time I took off on my broom._

_237) I should not remark that "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" when Snape gets angry. Ever._

_238) If I become an animagus, I am not allowed to yell "MORPHIN' TIME!" every time I change and I cannot do this whenever anyone else changes either._

_239) Yes, the Great Hall is extremely large, but Quidditch is an outside sport._

_240) Adding "-us" to the end of a word does not make it a spell, neither does adding "izzle"._

_241) I shall not shout "beam me up Scotty" before disapparating._

_242) will not dress up in a Dementor suit and use a Dustbuster on Harry's lips to get him to do what I want._

_243) I will not wear my 'DEATH EATER AND PROUD OF IT!' shirt to school_

_244) I do not have a Dalek Patronus_

_245) I should not cite "Lord Voldemort" as my greatest influance at Hogwarts_

_246) I am not allowed to wear black gloves at all times and say "Hogwarts is father. Hogwarts is mother_

_247) I will not set Ravenclaw house on the task of calculating the exact value of pi._

_248) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy_

_249) I may not take house points away from first-years for being "too goddamn short"_

_250) I will not hand red shirts to the new DADA professor and claim that they're the standard uniform for the position_

_251) The Muggle known as George W. Bush was not related to or working for Lord Voldemort in any way, and I am to stop trying to prove he was_

_252) I am not able to see the Grim Reaper, nor am I to claim that he is standing by the Headmaster, tapping an hourglass and looking at him impatiently. Or, for that matter, Harry Potter_

_253) I am not Voldemort's illegitimate love child _

_254) I am not the reincarnation of Merlin_

_255) Despite my personal beliefs, Quidditch would not improved by the introduction of muggle firearms_

_256) I will not replace Madam Pomfrey's Skele-Gro with pumpkin juice _

_257) I must not spread rumours that Lucius Malfoy is, was, or ever will be known in Death Eater circles as "Dobby's bitch."_

_258) Telling Lucius what he could do with his staff... is not advisable, less advisable if it involves anything sexual with Snape.  
>- Unless, you know... you bring me back pictures.<em>

_259) I will not sell tickets to get into the Chamber of Secrets  
>- Especially if it is only a one-way ticket<em>

_260) Hogwarts does NOT teach you how to banish people to the "shadow realm_

_261) It's not tasteful to approach Cho wearing a shirt that says `All the good-looking ones die young` with a picture  
>of Cedric Diggory on it<em>

_262) I will not tell first years that they should build a tree house in the Whomping Willow_

_263) I will not write forged letters home to the parents of Muggleborn first years detailing the Satanic rituals they are learning _

_264) I will not sneak up behind Ron and Hermione while they are in their Staring Snarky Yelling Matches and yell, "SLASH  
>SLASH SLASH! LET'S SEE SOME SLASH!"<em>

_265) Putting up Doug Henning posters in Filch's office is not appropriate. _

_266) I will not insist the house elves serve fried snake to the Slytherins. _

_267) I will not reenact Harry Potter Puppet Pals in the Great Hall  
>- Or anywhere else for that matter.<em>

_268) I will not shave Mrs. Norris._

_267) I will not write all my essays in red ink claiming it is blood. _

_268) I am not allowed to refere to myself as 'the new Dark Lord'_

_269) I am not allowed to tell the Hufflepuffs there is no Santa Clause_

_270) The next time that I see Rita Skeeter, I am not to threaten her with a can of Raid_

_271) Taking red paint and writing creepy messages on the walls is not funny_

_272) I will not kill the school chickens and wreak general havoc, then explain I was possessed by the Dark Lord_

_273) I am not allowed to steal Professor Flitwicks wand, hold it over my head and laugh as he tries to reach it_

_274) I am not allowed to wear death eater robes to dinner and shout" Long live Lord Voldemort" because I think its funny. _

_275) Skiving Snackboxes are not a suitable gift for first-years. _

_276) Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul is coincidental. _

_277) I am not allowed to sneak into Professor Snapes private chambers to watch him sing "I Will Survive in the mirror", as it is disturbing. _

_278) I will not mock Proffesor Dumbledore with exaggerated limb movements. _

_279) I am not allowed to draw a smiley face on my arm and tell everyone its the new Dark Mark. _

_280) If Ginny Weasley wanted to borrow my Darkover books, she would have said so already_

_281) I will not draw an H on Percy Weasley's forehead. _

_282) Filch does not have a sister named Magenta. _

_283) Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab does not sell potions ingredients, and I will not resell their products as "Veela Pheremones". _

_284) I will not refer to the Slytherin dorms as "the Tremere chantry". _

_285) The Malfoys are not Draka. _

_286) Hogwarts does not have a student council. Even if it did, they would not wear the rose seal. Therefore I will cease going after the prefects with a sword. _

_287) Richard Upton Pickman did not paint The Fat Lady._

_288) I will not refer to Umbridge as Queen of the Toads, even if she really is. _

_289) I am no longer allowed to use the words "pimp cane" in front of Draco Malfoy._

_- Or any other Slytherin. _

_290) I will not "borrow" a prefects' badge for Peeves. _

_291) I am not the Care of Witches Underwear Professor_

_-I am not a Professor, at all._

_292) I am no longer allowed in the student laundry_

_-Or the teacher laundry._

_293) I am not allowed to ever cast an Invisibility charm again_

_294) While wand safety is an important issue, I am no longer allowed to distribute any pamphlet, which makes reference to Belinda the Buttless._

_295) I will not give any girl a one half of a set of two-way mirrors as a Christmas present_

_-Especially if I don't tell her what it is. _

_296) The proper way to report to Professor McGonagall is "You wanted to see me, Professor?" Not "I have it on good authority that you have no evidence."_

_297) When someone accuses me of not wearing any drawers, I should ignore them. Attempting to prove them wrong is indecent_

_-Especially if I can't_

_298) If someone's House Badge is green and mine is purple, it means they are in Slytherin House. It does not mean "The Sorting Hat thinks they're dumber than me."_

_299) There is no "open-mike night" at Hogwarts._

_300) There is no bring a muggle to school day_

_- And I should stop insisting there is._

_301) I should not ask Professor McGonagall if, while in cat form, she has ever coughed up a hairball_

_302) I will not say that Harry Potter's godfather has "taken the veil." or got "killed by a curtain"_

_303) I am not to conjure the words "DRINK ME" onto the vial of any potion in Snape's classroom_

_304) Should I chance to see a Death Eater wearing a white mask, I should not start singing anything from "Phantom of the Opera._

_305) I will not cover myself in ectoplasm and walk out of a fireplace, saying I took the "Flu Network"._

_306) I will not ask Professor Sprout where the Jolly Green Giant is_

_307) I will not subvert the lock on the fourth-floor girls' bathroom and sell its location to first-years as "The Chamber of Secrets"._

_308) Professor McGonagall does not have an inappropriate relationship with Mrs. Norris_

_309) I must stop referring to the professors by the embarrassing nicknames they acquired in their school days_

_310) Nor am I to in any way substitute, alter, hide, or otherwise tamper with Professor Dumbledore's candy_

_311) I will not levitate everywhere in a big pink bubble_

_312) My professors have neither the time, nor the inclination to hear about what I did with six boxes of Sugar Quills_

_313) I will not use invisibility charms on anyones clothing_

_314) I do not know the Avada Kedavra curse, and pretending I do to people who annoy me is not funny, no matter how much they injure themselves diving for cover. _

_315) I am not to stare at the Great Hall ceiling during dinner in the winter and cry 'My god, it's full of stars!_

_316) I will not insult people and then say I was given Veritaserum_

_317) The four Houses are not the Morons, the Borons, the Smartasses and the Junior Death Eaters. _

_318) The house elves are not there to do my homework or the ghosts_

_319) Grindewald is not my role model and neither is Voldemort_

_320) I will not cast 'Petrificus Totalus' on myself in order to avoid going to classes. _

_321) I am not allowed to Accio the clothing of any person while they are wearing it, even my own_

_322) Regardless of how much Professor Snape's hair might annoy me, it is inappropriate to sneak into his room at night and shave it off_

_-Likewise, it is unkind to make the aforementioned hair into a wig and wear it to potions class_

_-Nobody cares that it makes me feel "pretty"._

_323) Shouting "Accio Kreacher!" is not the proper way to get house-elf assistance_

_324) It is not necessary for me to yell "BURN!" every time Snape takes points away from Gryffindor_

_325) "Defying my will" is not a crime worthy of life in Azkaban, and I should not tell that to the first-years_

_326) I am not allowed to forget my Omnioculars in either the boys' or the girl's bathroom. Especially not while they are in recording mode._

_327) I will not speak to Professor Snape with a Transylvanian accent_

_328) I will not cast the occasional Oblivate spell on Dumbledore. Even if it would be amusing_

_329) I will not start a rumor saying that Professor Snape sings "I'm too sexy for my robes" while showering. Or for that matter doing any other activity_

_330) Announcing "Remember: Save a broomstick! Ride a wizard!" is not an appropriate way to conclude a Quidditch match_

_331) Voldemort, after being defeated, did not get served_

_332) I will not call Pizza Hut and ask them to deliver to the common room_

_333) If I even look like I might sing "I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves" I will be Obliviated_

_334) I will not tell first years that "any true wizard or witch" can see Thestrals, and that if they can't they "obviously aren't cut out for this school"._

_335) I am not to tell Muggleborn first-years that Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans taste better when one eats a whole handful simultaneously._

_336) I will not tell First Year Muggle-borns that Pokmon battles are a part of the Care of Magical Creatures curriculum _

_337) I am not a 'ninja sent here by Lord Voldemort to destroy Harry Potter' and should stop shouting this at meal times._

_338) Teaching first years to chorus in unison "The amazing bouncing ferret" whenever they hear the name Draco Malfoy is just wrong, funny, but wrong._

_339) Dont tell Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs that Lucius Malfoy goes around singing "Dance, Dark Lord, Dance"_

_340) Bungee jumping off the astronomy tower is against the rules, even if it isn't written anywhere_

_341) I will not Turn myself into Malfoy (Pollyjuice potion) and tell everyone in Hogwarts my undying love for Proffesor Snape...again_

_342) I won't dress up in a black robe, wear a bald wig and tell people that I'm Voldemort_

_343) I will not yell "I saw Malfoy and snape last night!" in the great hall or anywere_

_344) Pokemon are not real, therefore i will not convince Hagrid that Pokemon are real animals so that he'll have a leson all about pokemon_

_345) The Philosipher's stone is destroyed and even though they are annoying, first year slytherins should not be told its still down there, as they all want imortality,and the devils snare gets them every time._

_346) Calling the ASPCA about the way Ron treated Scabbers (wormtail) is pointless, as he is already dead_

_347) I will not follow anyone around saying "pimp hat" at the most random moments_

_348) I must not sell fake stories to Rita Skeeter since she everything she publishes are lies_

_349) This list being used as a checklist is inappropriate, therefore i shouldn't do so_

_350) Nothing on this list was an honest mistake_

Please do something to cease this behaviour! Also on his work on what he wants to do when he's older, here it is enclosed also. I would be concerned about this

**My Careers Advice Essay Thingy by James Sirius Potter**

_Hello Professor McGonagall! Lets talk about how amazing and successful my future is going to be!_

_First and foremost, I'm going to marry Jenny Skater who is the red-head in my year and as all you know i have had a crush on since 2nd year but keeps turning me down, we are gonna live happily ever after in a cozy little house and have a kid with blue eyes and scruffy hair called James Jr- well, enough on my kid's future and on to mine._

_That is the most important goal in my life, after marrying Jenny, is my Job. So, I heard Jenny saying to a friend of hers-Loreile, in case you're curious- about something muggles call Sycrisht! No- sychirisisist!A Psychiatrist! Yes! That's what muggles go to when they're feeling depressed, and obviously, with my charm and skills and with the reality that upholds me- everyone loves me! Yes, even you Professor no matter how much you deny it! So I thought, why not give it a go! I did give it a go and I used Albus as a patient, you see, Professor, Albus was feeling a bit depressed one day so naturally, as the kind and caring brother I am, I offered him sessions as a Psychiatrist. Laughter is the best medicine so i did that._

_Albus is very ticklish in the stomach, so I strapped him to a chair and poked his stomach all day long! Original, eh? He laughed so hard that he got sweaty a bit so I splashed water on his face occasionally- and know what? He was cured! He was laughing and laughing and laughing away- well, he was cursing me between his fits but, I chose to ignore it- he can get rather senseless that boy can… Albus got really angry after that, you see, he ran after me all day long- well for a week really- ripping me to shreds and stuff, so I came to the conclusion that he was ill and needed treatment. So I concluded with my ingenious brain that Albus needed Anger Management!_

_I strapped him to a chair in a white room and then I took out a book and Rory started reading to him, you know how Albus loves his books, so, I thought that that would calm him down But he kept interrupting and screaming more and insulted me a lot but as the caring Doctor I am, I ignore it- well, not really, I kind of screamed back at him but moving on_

_I came to the conclusion that Albus was mental. If his anger wasn't treated then there must be something wrong with his brain! So, I thought about the offer of becoming a Brain Doctor! I read a few books on surgery- well, not really- I mean it couldn't be that hard, right? All I had to do was chop off the person's head and say 'Reparo' to the brain and Tah Tan! He's fixed! So, I suggested this to Albus and he threatened to throw himself off the astronomy tower! I mean come on? The usually composed Albus was turning to Rose! It struck me! My Cousin was missing so I took matters into my own hands! I heard that muggle Please-men looked for missing people and tracked bad guys so I wanted to become a please-man! I wore a coat and made a search part of First Years- in the command of Rory, you know how much he looks like a first year, so he gets along with them well- and stuck posters on the wall!_

_IMPORTANT NOTICE!_

_MISSING CHILD!_

_HAVE YOU SEEN THIS BOY GIRL?_

_"Picture of Rose"_

_IF SEEN, THEN REPORT TO JAMES POTTER AND RORY PATTINSON AND CLAIM YOUR PRIZE!_

_Prize: a chocolate frog. _

_I'm a poor guy Professor, I don't have much money, you see because mum and dad keep cutting off my pocket money since i keep getting into trouble at school. So anyways, every ten seconds a person would come in carrying her on their shoulders. Of course, as a Please-man I had to go and inspect if she was Rose and not someone in Polyjuice. Well, the guy was quite rude really,i will not tell you what he said! Then, I saw a clear artifact that he was indeed not Rose! He was her dorky little brother- Hugo Weasley, man, those two look so alike it's kind of scary. _

_So, yeah, that situation happened over and over again, every time the poor bloke walked out of the common room he was carried back by a different group of Gryffindors. So, I told them that I didn't want the little pesky freak and I wanted ROSE. So, they tried removing his clothes so I wouldn't see the Slytherin colour… wow, all that for a chocolate frog, I know! But then, with my overly-amazing- talents, I found Rose! She was taking a bath in the bathroom… well, the job was too easy for me so I declined the offer, but then I found out that the picture I put in the posters was indeed Hugo and not Rose, but- I, um…the reason was- it wasn't a mistake! I was looking for an assistant of my qualities to join me in my please-man-hood! So, I found there was none, so, dismally, I continued my journey… alone. _

_Then, the thought came into me! I wanted something that wasn't too easy yet something that I won't get in trouble with... I want to be... to be... A TEACHER! You'll always see my face Professor, even AFTER I graduate, isn't that great! That way, you won't miss me and I'll pull as much pranks as I can and NOT get detention! Ingenious isn't it? Expect me for the rest of your life Professor! Professor Potter… it sure does have a nice ring to it- and, so my darling Jennykins won't miss me, she can become a Professor too! Isn't that great, I took on the duty of making her choices? Right? I'm such a selfless soul, I know! So, no need to tell me goodbye Professor when I will graduate with flying colours, since I'm going to apply first thing the next day! You'll never have to shed a tear and I can take care of all the sneaky Slytherins for you- see, even more selfless!_

_Your Sincerelly_

_James Sirius Potter_

_J.S.P_

I mean it is obvious that he rushed that and wrote down the thing words that popped into his head, so please i beg of you, controll your son, and try to get him to study more like your other son Albus Potter, Thank you for your time

Yours Sincerelly

Minerva Mcgonagall

M.M

**After no 130 i added add lot since it came up to 350, i was bored and decided to add more, so if you haven't read the ones after no 130 then please do so, I also edited a few words, enjoy :D **


	2. Notes, Lovelife and Laughter Part I

**Notes, Love life and Laughter Part I**

Teddy the new DADA teacher was standing in the classroom teaching a whole class of 4th years and was getting pretty fed up since James kept whispering to his friend Rory and Selena. Teddy spun around on the spot and glared at his godbrother.

"James, stop talking and pay attention" teddy announced to him

James stopped talking and looked at teddy till teddy turned back around then turned back talking to his friends

"I'm telling you, Jamie. It's impossible! You cannot make Snape laugh!" Selena whispered

James who is commonly called Jamie replied "I James Sirius Potter never back away from a bet, I can do this!"

"And what may I ask is your plan?" Rory asked

James glanced at Lara Smith, across the classroom, talking to her friends Lorelei and Jenny. _Jenny, oh my darling Jenny_, James thought. James has had a crush on Jenny since 2nd year and has been asking her out ever since but she kept turning him down. _Her beautiful blood-red hair, her beautiful blue eyes gleaming in the sun, her...no don't think about that_, James thought again. James glanced away from Jenny back to Rory and Selene.

"Lara" James replied

"Lara? How can she help?" Selena asked

James opened his school bag and took out a tiny black box and placed it on the table

"What's that?" Rory and Selene asked

"After a lot of figuring stuff out I came to Al for a little bit of help, he told me laughing gas"

"Laughing gas?"

"exactly and if laughing gas doesn't make Snape laugh then nothing will unless he tortures to someone to oblivion like the greasy git he-"

"JAMES!" Selene hissed a little too loudly

Teddy spun around again "is there a problem Ms Jones?"

"No not at all" Selene replied. Teddy went back to teaching

"As I was saying I'm not really good at charming up laughing gas so I thought of someone who is and that is Lara"

"Genius" Rory said.

James grinned and ripped out a page out of his book and wrote on it

_Lara i need your help_

_J.S.P_

James then levitated it to Lara's desk being careful not to catch Teddy's eye, Lara read and scribbled on it and then levitated it back to James desk. It said

_What do you want, Potter?_

_L.L.S_

James wrote back saying

_I hear you are pretty good at charms so I need a favor, can you conjure up laughing gas in my back box, I'm trying to make Snape laugh, don't ask why_

_J.S.P_

James this time scrunched it up and threw it at her hitting her hand in the process but she opened it up and wrote in it

_I don't need to ask why, lemma guess, someone you dared you to, or someone bet you to something or something like that. I will help you if you stop asking out my best friend Jenny, she's getting really tired off you, potter_

_L.L.S_

Lara scrunched it up and chucked it at James again, James who read it, felt heartbroken and sad, he couldn't. He just couldn't. He couldn't let her go! _not over a stupid bet, can't believe I just said that but moving on, she's my Jennykins, it's meant to be, i can see it perfectly now, but jenny and her stupid pride, _James thought. James scribbled furiously and chucked it at Lara hitting her face, with teddy watching, teddy sighed but pretended he didn't see anything went back to teaching

_No deal, Smith. Not giving up that easily... while we're on the subject... has Skater changed her mind, eh? *wink wink*_

_J.S.P_

Lara half-smiled and glanced at James again with a look of sympathy on her face and wrote and levitated to James again

_Afraid not, Potter. Jenny is just not going to suddenly fall heads over heels over you :) But just because I'm nice yes i will, levitate the box over here and I'll do it now_

_L.L.S_

James smiled. YES! he got to keep asking out his Jennykins and do the prank so giving Lara a thumbs-up and did as she asked, levitated the box to Lara who got out her wand to begin doing the spell. whilst doing so, James glanced down at his text book, he didn't do any work in DADA today, he did do work in the lesson just nothing to do with DADA, neatly written in bold letters massively on the page were the initials _J.S_- standing for Jenny Skater. Lara was levitating the box back again to James again, he noticed there was a sticky not. Kneeling forward to read it, Teddy suddenly started to ask James a question

"What was the last sentence I just said James" teddy asked

"Huh?" James replied stupidly

"What was the last sentence i just said?" teddy said more clearly

A few people in the classroom sniggered

"Er... what was the last sentence I just said" James said confidently.

"I beg your pardon?" teddy asked shocked

"You just asked me what was the last sentence you just said, and what was the last sentence I just said was actually the last sentence you just said, if you get me" James replied cheekily and added "professor Lupin"

Students in the class chuckled, if it was anyone else who said that then they would have gasped and be shocked but seeing as it is James Sirius Potter it wasn't really surprising. Teddy was shocked, agape; it was his 1st month working as the DADA teacher, the same position as his father Remus Lupin

"Detention Mr. potter, tonight after class straight away, and see me after class" teddy announced his hair turning bright red then green. The bell rang. "Oh, right, well then now then, everyone may now leave" Everyone started to pack and leave

"Nice one mate" Selene said grinning and James and James grinned back

"Funny, I was dying to laugh" Rory chuckled "we'll meet you in the common room" James nodded. James started to pack his stuff then remembered the sticky note Lara left on the black box, James knelt forward, it said

_Don't blame me if you get caught, and I also added a little trick to it :D I put an ant-vanishing charm on so it will probably take forever for Snape to get rid of! :)_

_L.L.S_

James grinned, _fantastic! Thanks Lara!_ He thought

"James!" teddy shouted snapping James out of his thoughts "come here!" James put his stuff in his bag and walked to teddy

"Yes?" James asked

"Can't you at least behave in my lesson, please, I'm trying so hard and here you are being cheeky and slacking off, whispering and throwing paper across rooms" Teddy said sadly

"Sorry, just you know me teds, I'm your godbrother, you've known me for 14 odd years, and besides I'm a huge influence on everyone, worse then dad and granddad put together!"

"So I've heard, when i got the job the first thing i got told was "watch out for James Sirius Potter, he's a right troublemaker!" teddy joked cheering up

James grinned and teddy smiled

"Sorry but you have got to go a detention today" James groaned" at McGonagall's transfiguration classroom, since I'm busy tonight"

"Alright been in McGonagall's classroom/office a million times now so doesn't bother me now and ahhhh, busy are you, with Victoire" James joked laughing

"Shut it" teddy said half-joking" and you may now leave no Jamie"

"tar and let me know how it goes with my cousin Victoire alright will ya, _professor Lupin_"

Teddy rolled his eyes and James left the room on his way to detention


	3. Notes, Lovelife and Laughter Part II

**Notes, Love life and Laughter Part II**

James Sirius Potter walked into Transfiguration room for detention. At once he saw Rory Patterson, his best friend since first year, at the desk was Professor McGonagall, writing. James walked up to her desk, Rory looking confused of why James was here

"Hey Minnie!"

McGonagall looked up from her work only just realizing James is in the room, sighed

"How many times do I have to tell you, Potter? I told you to _never _address me like that, it's Professor McGonagall"

James shrugged obviously not paying attention and not caring

"Detention again, Potter?" James nodded "with whom?"

"Teddy" James replied

McGonagall glared at James for addressing Teddy like this when he's a teacher

"Sorry, Professor Lupin, just he's my godbrother so it's kind of weird calling him that"

McGonagall nodded "Sit down"

James sat by Rory was mouthing words at James but he couldn't understand him because James can't lip read making James mouth _"what"_ Rory shrugged his shoulders and was about to whisper something till McGonagall glared at the both of them, after 3mins, McGonagall stood up

"i just need to see the headmaster, please excuse me, do NOT leave this room, I shall charm the door and windows so you don't get any funny ideas, when the bell ring at 5, you may leave, the spell shall wear off by then" James and Rory nodded and as soon as she left the both of them attacked at each other with questions

"What are you doing here!" James asked

"I told you before Minnie gave me detention in her lesson for giving her cheek, what you doing here?"

"Teddy told me to come here since he's busy with Victoire tonight"

"Oh right, coincidence!" Rory joked

"It's coincidence and luck!" James Joked back

They both laughed

"You thinking what I'm thinking?" they both said at the same time

"No way, you too" they said again at the same time

They looked at each other and laughed

"Now she said we can't leave by the door or windows, any other way?" James said

"That pretty much is the only ways to get out"

"True, maybe there's something on her desk which will tell us how to undo the spell"

"Maybe"

They both started searching her desk

"Jamie? How is Teddy a DADA teacher, he only just left last year?"

"Don't know, but as you said he left last year, they can do that, I mean he is 4years older than me"

"True" Rory replied

"Wait, what's this! Look it says _Dear Mr. and Mrs. Potter_! She's writing to my parents again, well she did tell me she's going to but, still!"

Rory gasps "You better hide that; you'll get in trouble with your parents!"

"Think she'll notice if I hide it, I mean she has written a dozen letters to mum and dad, they have a whole collection"

Rory who was reading the letter chuckled" Looks like she has given up being formal now"

James laughed

"When did we ride flying motorbikes to school?" Rory asked

"Er... I think it was first year

_Flashback_

_"Mum, dad, we want ice cream" James said to his parents loudly with Rory at his side_

_"But if you get some you'll miss the train" Dad said aka Harry_

_"We'll be proper quick, we promise!" James said_

_Mum aka Ginny was looking concerned but replied "alright, here is your tickets, you remember how to get on the platform, right" James and Rory nodded "alright, be safe, bye" Ginny kissed her son goodbye_

_"See you James, remember the train leaves at 11, which is in 7mins so hurry"" Harry hugged his son goodbye. Ginny and Harry aka Mum and Dad grabbed Al's and Lily's hand since they hadn't started Hogwarts yet and walked away and waved goodbye_

_"But MUM!" cried Al in tears "I want to GO! I want to go Hogwarts"_

_"YEAH, me too" cried Lily in tears_

_"Al you'll be going next year and Lily, you'll be going in 3years" James heard Dad say, then they was out of sight_

_"Come on, Jamie" Rory said, and they ran to the ice- cream shop_

_After some time later_

_"I love ice-cream so much!" Rory said happily_

_"Yeah" James agreed "Come on, let's go to the train"_

_"Er... James" Rory was sounding extremely worried then_

_"Yeah?" James replied worryingly_

_"Didn't your dad say the train leaves at 11?"_

_"Yeah"_

_"Apparently to that clock we missed it" Rory said pointing_

_James looked where Rory was pointing; it said 11:15 "Oh CRAP!" James cursed_

_10 minutes later_

_James and Rory were now in motorbikes, with Hogwarts in the distance_

_"THIS IS AWESOME! WOOOOOOOOOO!" they both screamed, suddenly they both crashed in the Hogwarts wall, smashing down wall in process._

_The crowd cheered, ran towards them, making McGonagall turn red with rage and shock, Dumbledore or how James likes to refer him to "Santa" was turning pale and his eyes starting sparkling_

_"YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOO! YAHHHHHOOOOOOOOO!_

_Professor McGonagall stormed up them, put her wand to he face screamed "SILENCOOOOO" making everyone turn quite_

_"POTTER, PATTINSON! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!"_

_James saw Teddy in distance with his friends, who was still attending Hogwarts at the time, laughing his head off, holding the side of his stitch, other students were also laughing too angering McGonagall even more_

_"HEYY MINNIE" James shouted_

_"MY OFFICE NOW, HONESTLY, WHY DONT YOU ALL DRIVE TO HOGWARTS IN MOTORBIIKES, CRASH DOWN WALLS DURING PROFFESOR DUMBLEDORES SPEECH AND CREATE HAVOC IN SCHOOL!" McGonagall screeched sarcastically_

_**End of Flashback**_

"That was funny! Surprised we weren't expelled" Rory said laughing

"I know yeah!" James agreed laughing, remembering the howler mum and dad sent, James couldn't remember his mum being so angry

"And here is that work you wrote on things you must not do, man, some of these were kind of funny _I must stop trying to make Professor Snape laugh_ hmmmm, have you done that yet?"

"No, not yet, I will later tommorow in Potions" James replied

"Ah, right, you better-... wait what, here's is your Careers thing here, so much imagination, James" Rory then said in a high pitched voice _"I'm going marry Jenny Skater"_

"Oh, shut up" James said playfully "but I tell you, it's going to happen!"

"Sure" Rory said not convinced "Well as I was saying you better take that letter, just in case, i mean she isn't going to notice with the amount of letters she sends"

"Yeah" James agreed putting the letter in his pocket "and here's an idea"

"What?"

"see the ceiling" James said looking up, Rory looked up too, the ceiling in McGonagall's room got redone, so you could just push up the cardboard thing, forming the ceiling, get up there crawl about

"I see what you're saying; you're saying we climb out the room through the ceiling and TAH! TAH! We're out and McGonagall will never know a thing!"

"YUPP, HIGH FIVE!"

James and Rory high-fived

_Meanwhile with James and Rory in the vent_

"Climb in the ceiling, ha-ha, wasn't very clever of Minnie to do this"

"Imagine the look on McGonagall's face if she caught us" they both burst out laughing

BAM!

"AAARGGGGGGHHHH!"

Rory and James crashed down from the ceiling leaving a hole in the ceiling, falling on each other and in pain

"OWWWWWWWWWWW!" they sceamed

"BLOODY HELL!" They screamed holding their arms to attempt help stop the pain

"Ahem"

James and Rory lifted their heads from the floor, there right in front of them was Proffesor McGonagall looking annoyed and shocked

"hello!" Rory announced still in pain

James and Rory struggled to stand up, still pain both still muttering _"ow"_ over and over again

"May I ask what is this" McGonagall asked

James noticed Proffesor McGonagall was not alone, behind her was Proffesor Dumbledore looking very amused of the sitiutation, and Teddy aka Proffesor Lupin who looked like he was struggling to keep a straight face, dying to laugh

"Er... what do you think this is?" James finally answered

"Well it looks like to me, you were climbing through the ceiling and came crashing down causing a hole in the headmasters office, unless you have another theory, what _are _you doing out of detention, Potter, Pattinson?" she screached, glaring at the both of them

"Er... we were taking a walk" James lied

Teddy snorted, McGonagall glared at him but he covered it up with coughing, she brought her attention back to James and Rory

"A walk? A walk!" she screeched

Proffesor Dumbledore chuckled

"AH, yes I'm pretty sure, _CRAWLING _in the ceiling is walking" she shouted sarcasicelly

Rory chose to ignore this comment "Yes! We needed to stretch out legs"

Rory was James best friend who also had the same interests as James and loved pranking, was really rubbish at lying

"STRETCH YOUR LEGS! HOW THE BLOODY HELL IS CRAWLING IN THE CEILING GOING TO STRETCH YOUR LEGS! STUPID IDIOTIC-MORONS! HONESTLY HOW STUPID CAN YOU GET! CRAWLING! STRETCH YOUR LEGS! WALKING! STUPID ARRAGONT TOERAGS, YOU-"

Rory interuppting, decided to point out " Minnie?" McGonagall glared at him, so he quickly re-corrected himself "Proffesor?, as a teacher, you're not allowed to curse, or call us students names"

McGonagall paled, Teddy raised his eyebrows, Proffesor Dumbledore half-smiled

"Er..." Proffesor McGonagall stammered

Proffesor Dumbledore decided to jump in and help Proffesor McGonagal "If you could ignore Minerva's insults we would let you off with this" he glanced up at the broken ceiling, James and Rory grinned "I mean you must understand that you sometimes drive Minerva to her wits end"

"And... you let us off with the detention and we pretend that today never happened" James said happily

"Agreed" Proffesor McGonagall croaked, regaining colour

"James, Rory, Teddy, you are dismissed" Proffesor Dumbledor announced

Teddy, James and Rory walked out the headmasters office

"That was a close one" James said, reliefed

"I know yeah!" Rory agreed

"What the hell were you doing!" Teddy hissed half-amused, half-scarlet "Climbing in ceilings?"

"We needed a way to get out detention" James said

"She charmed the windows and doors so we couldn't get out" Rory added

"So you decided to climb in the ceiling! And the luck of that!"

"I know yeah!" Rory said chuckling

"What are you doing here anyway, thought you supposed to be with Victoire?" James asked

"That's what you assumed, Jamie. I actually got called to go to the headmasters office to see how I'm settling in, McGonagall needed to know my views as well, that's why she was there"

"Oh" James and Rory said, not knowing what else to say

"I gotta go to my office, you two off to your dormitory!" Teddy said, walking off

"Wanna go the kitchens, I'm starving! It's night time but oh well"

"Yeah! Let's feast, got the Maurders Map?"

"Yupp" James said getting out his map. Harry Potter his father did not give James the map, he simply nicked it off him, rummaging through harrys old stuff, found an old parchement that had a sticky note on it saying _Map of Hogwarts- to activate say "I solemly swear that I am up to no good" to de-activate say "mischeif mannaged" _James was so happy when he found the map so he just simply nicked it off him, Harry aka his Dad hasn't noticed yet, well that's what James thinks so far.

"No teachers on the way" James said looking at the parchement. They walked slowly to the kitchen and had their feast


	4. Notes, Lovelife and laughter part III

**Notes, Love life and Laughter Part III**

"Aaaaaaarggghhhhhhhhh" James moaned in potions today. No one noticed so he tried again.

"Aaaaaaarrrrggggggghhhhhhhh!" a little louder

Selena rolled her eyes and Rory snorted at James self-wanted-attention of boredom

"WILL YOU SHUT UP!" Snape roared spraying spit at Alice Longbottom(Nevilles daughter who Neville named after his mother) whilst Snape was _attempting _to teach Alice what the drought of living dead is. Alice cringed and wiped the spit off her, grossed out

"Jeez ok, calm down" James said quickly. When Snape turned around teaching Alice again, he muttered "_Drama queen"_

"Why don't you try that prank, you know the black box, the one where you're trying to make Snape laugh" Selena offered

James slapped his forehead "OH YEAH!"

People around glared at him, and he glared back making them go back to their work which is to make the drought of living dead in potions today, but since Alice had no idea what it was, Snape was explaining it, _terribly_ I may add.

"I forgot about that, you know what, I'll do it now, I've got in in my bag-"...

"YOU'RE IMPOSSIBLE, YOU STUPID, IDIOTIC GIRL!" Snape shouted. Everyone glanced at Snape and Alice in shock. "GET OUT, STAND OUTSIDE, I'LL DEAL WITH YOU IN A MINUTE!"

Alice scared shitless, walked outside, strembling slightly. Snape stormed to his desk, ripped out a peice of paper, writing down furiously on the behaviour to give to the head of house describing Alice's _terrible behaviour _and stormed outside and started shouting at her

"WHAT IS SO HARD ABOUT KNOWING WHAT THE DROUGHT OF LIVING DEAD IS, READ THE BLOODY TEXT BOOK, YOU STUPID GIRL, I MEAN HONESTLY-"

No one could hear any more since the the door slammed shut, since all the rooms are soundproof, not being able to hear what's happening next door if the door or window is shut. Everyone sat there in shock and after 2mins set back to work since they didn't want to be Snape's next victim

James thinking any time is as good as any, bent down in his bag and got the black box out of his bag and walked over to Snape's desk, placing it on his desk and set it to go off 10seconds after Snape sits on his chair.

"What do you think YOU'RE doing!" Snape snarled who just walked back in from his screaming session who just sent Alice to her head of house

"Just getting a spoon to put the powder in my potion" he said causually and walked back to his seat. Snape glared and eyed him but didn't say anything and hurried to his desk and sat down

10 seconds later, the black box exploding sending gases in the air, everyone stopped and stared, 30 seconds later after the gas spread in the entire room, everyone started laughing like crazy except Snape who was trying his best not to but was grinning like an idiot

"What the hell is going on!" Snape demanded, still grinning who had the talk quitely to fight the laughing gas, eventually he couldn't hold it any longer, his laugh wasn't like a normal persons and light, it was heavy, like he hadn't laughed once in his entire laugh, and evilly possible more darker then Lord Voldemorts was.

"EVASCANO!" Snape screamed still laughing like an idiot, but the gas was still there and _everyone_ was still into laughing fits. He tried all sorts off spells but the laughing gas still remained with everyone still laughing, eventually Snape had to evecuate everyone into a classroom resulting in Snape writing on a blackboard describing what the drought of living is, for Alice's benefit who Snape sent back in.

Everyone stopped laughing by now, except James and Rory, who was still laughing a bit but not as hard as in the potions room.

"What are you laughing at, Potter!" Snape snarled, his lower lip curling, ignoring Rory altogether.

"Nothing, sir, nothing" James chuckled

"Why do I have a feeling that the _little_ gas in the the the potions classroom was your little trick, Potter?" he said sarcasticely "DETENTION WITH ME AFTER LESSON TODAY!"

"One detention, huh" James said cockingly

"Double detention!" Snape shot back

"_Just two, huh? I've had worse_" James muttered to himself

Snape, who somehow heard this, or was using Occlumency to read James mind or was dying to give him triple detention shot back "Triple detention, then, today my office after lesson" and went back to teaching the lesson, who ignored James groan

**After James Triple detention(wasn't much of a detention since James was doodling on a peice of spare paper and charmed his quill to to write the line "**_**I must respect Proffesor Snape" **_**300 times)**

James was on his way back to the the Griffindor common room when he bumped into Rose

"HEY ROSE!" James shouted

"HEY JAMES!" Rose shouted back clearly annoyed

"Wassup? What you doing here at this time of night, eh?"

Rose ignored the first question. "Nothing just talking to Proffesor McGonagall"

James who noticed a peice of paper in Rose's hand made a grab for it shouting "WHAT'S THAT!" and Rose screaming "GIVE IT BACK!"

But while they were trying to wrestle for the paper James read out loud

_"I, Minerva McGonagall, give permission for Rose Weasley, age 14, daughter of Hermione and Ronald Weasely, to use a TIME TURNER so Rose could use the TIME TURNER to go back time for lessons..."_

By this point Rose managed to snatch the letter out of James hand, and pushing James away to make sure he doesn't make a grab for it, and glared at him

"OW, whats that for!" he exclaimed, rubbing his arm, where Rose's sharp, long nailed scratched him whilst they were wrestling for letter

"Sorry...wait why am I apoligising, IT'S YOUR OWN FAULT, you shouldn't of tried to read the letter, Proffesor McGonagall made me promise not to tell anyone" Rose shouted, close to tears

"Why, look I promise I won't tell anyone!" seeing Rose cheer up, continued " Are you getting a time turned to attend more lessons, isn't that what Aunt Hermione did!"

Rose nodded

"Do you have it with you, can I see it?" James asked

"I don't have it now, and even if I did, I won't let you see it, you're such an idiot you'll probarly mess it up or get us somewhere in the past!" Rose exclaimed

"Oi! I'm not that stupid" Rose snorted, James ignored it and continued "Please let me see it, Please I'll be careful!" James begged

"Oh pl-ur-se, you always do stupid things, it wouldn't suprise me if you would go camping in the forbidden forest-" James head snapped up "I'm willing to bet you that-"

"Wait, what?"

Rose rolled her eyes " I said you always do stupid things and it would't surprise me if you camped in the forbidden forest for a day and I'm willin-"

"GENIUS!" James exclaimed, intterupting Rose "I take that bet, Rose Weasely!"

Rose stared" What bet?" she asked confused

"I, James Sirius Potter am going to camp in the forbidden forest for a day!" he shouted

Rose, still staring said slowly, cocking her head slightly to the side "okay..." clearly thinking _what the HELL!_

"Thank you for that brilliant, genius idea, ROSE!" Shouting her name extra loud as if wanting to tell the prefects patrolling the castle that Rose is right here, surprising that no one caught them yet with the amount of noise they made.

James hugged Rose they walked away, when James was out of sight, Rose still with the _what the hell_ expression on her face, shook it off, thinking that _just the typical, James_, followed her cousin to to the Griffindor Common room


	5. Bets, Forbidden Forests and Trouble

**Bets, Forbidden Forests and Trouble**

**Oh yeah I forgot to say this, I do not own harry potter, I am not JK rowling, all rights go to her. I am not doing this for money.**

**Enjoy and please review! :D**

"You cannot be serious?"

"Yes, actually I am" James replied cheekingly

"Not that stupid joke again, I mean honestly!" Al said annoyed

"I, James Sirius Potter, am going to camp in the the forbidden forest" James announced grinning

Al rolled his eyes unable to believe his brothers stupidity "And may I ask why?"

"Rose gave me the idea, and I imagine Jenny will be all over me when I do this" James answered as he saw Jenny walk past. Al resisted the urge to roll his eyes again

"YO SKATER!" James shouted and Al groaned. Jenny stopped and turned towards them

"What do you want, Potter?" she replied

"Guess what I'm going to do tonight?"

"Camp in the forbidden forest, obviously I know after you announced it in the great hall this morning, you were lucky the teachers weren't there, how stupid do you have to be to camp in the forbiddon forest, I mean honestly!" Jenny told him

"Exactly!" Al said loudly, they both ignored him

"Pattinson and Jones are going mad in the common room giving out bets at the moment" she went on "Everyones going crazy about it" she rolled her eyes

"I know everyones betting on me whether i do it, I'm gonna be rich, Skater. So...*winks* Skater how would you like to-"

"NO! I'm never, and I repeat NEVER going out with you" and with that she stormed off

"Ok, I'll pick you up at 7 tommorow night if thats-"

"NO!" she shouted in the distance

"Ahhh, she so has crush on me!" James said with a silly grin on his face then went back to his book

Al shook his head "Are you actually, _reading_!"

"Yeah, a book from the restricted section"

"Oh, no surprises there then, why can't you read normal books?"

"Normal books are boring, I like books from the restriced section, this one is quite interesting actually, it's about forbidden spells"

Al's eyes widened "Forbidden Spells!" he repeated

"Yeah, are you deaf as well as stupid...actually no you read too much to be stupid" james said laughing

"_Oh ha ha_, what are you doing, reading forbiddon spells, they are forbiddon for a reason" Al hissed

"Give it a rest, you sound like Minnie"

"Well, I'm telling Rose!"

"Go on then, she already knows anyway and what she going to do, write a letter to mum and dad" James paused " That reminds me I need to write a letter to mum and dad to see if they will let me stay here for the christmas holidays I mean I like going home and stuff but imigane an empty school imagine the stuff I can get up to!" James said it all in one breathe

"No chance, and I mean no chance they will let you"

"They might" James started writing the letter then sent it off using the family owl

"Well I'm going to the common room" James said and set off to the the Griffindor common room. While on the way there James bumped into Hugo, Rose's brother.

"Hey, James, Is it true, are you really going to camp in the forbiddon forest tonight?" Hugo said eagerly

"You bet I am, high five" they then high-fived

"Here is my vote, I know you can do it" Hugo said grinning, handing over his vote

"Thanks, see ya" James said and he walked into the common room and was immediately surounded by cheering and people

"Ok people, I need to get past" James said and walked up to Rory and Selena

"Here is Hugos vote" James said putting it in the box

"You got loads of votes" Selena said happily " We're going to be rich!"

"Oh yeah!" James and Rory replied excitedly

"Potter" a voice said

James turned round, the was 2 prefects

"What?"

"I just want to say good luck, I was going to tell a teacher but..."he shrugged his shoulders. The other one said "Here is your vote and I think you can do it" they walked off

Lily Luna Potter, James' and Al's youngest and only sister walked up to James, and glared at him

"I think it's really immiture what your doing, Jamie, but here is my vote" she walked off

"She doesn't think I can do it" James said reading the peice of paper "My own flesh and blood, how could she" he said dramitically and playfully

"Neither does Albus" Selena replied

"Traitors" James said playfully " Oh well too bad for them, they'll be the ones losing precious gallons"

James then cleared his throat " Attention everyone!" Everyone piped down " I just want to say thank you for your sopport and votes because I can totally do this!"

**Meanwhile 2hours later in the forbiddon forest**

"I can't friggin do this!" James shouted, shivering in the cold

"THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE!" he shouted to particuarly no one in the cold, his voice echoeing "Damn you, Rose for giving me this _stupid _idea, oh well, I can set a record" he added, grinning

*snap*

"What was that?" James said jumping up, looking around, cautius and scared. Seeing nothing muttered "_probarly nothing, probarly just a rabbit stepping on to a twig or something... oh wait rabbits don't step... they hop, yeah, oh great I've officialy gone insane, I am talking to myeslf" _" I AM TALKING TO MYSELF! LIKE A SADDOOOO!" he shouted at the top of his lungs.

"ROOOOOOOOOARRRRRRRR!" roared a loud creature in the forest

"AAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!" James screamed (and may I add girly-ish and high-pitched)

Abandoning his stuff ran away as fast away as fast as he can, pushing away twigs, and trodding on plants, panting, with something chasing him in the forest, James once again screamed, yelling. Thinking, _oh no it's coming closer, ITS COMING CLOSER, IT'S GOING TO EAT MEEE! I'M GOING TO DIEE! I NEVER THOUGHT I'LL DIE BEING MONSTER FOOD, I ALWAYS THOUGHT I'LL DIE WHEN PLAYING FOR THE A HUGE, FAMOUS QUITTICH GAME AND I'LL GET HIT BY A BLUDGER ENSURING WE WIN THE GAME THEN I FALL TO MY DEATH, THEN MY DAD RUNS TO ME(OTHER PEOPLE AS WELL OFF COURSE) AND THEN I'LL WHISPER TO MY DAD(MY LAST WORDS) "Dad, we won, Dad, we won!" AND THEN- WAIT WHY AM I THINKING ABOUT HOW I ALWAYS THOUGHT OF HOW I'M GOING TO DIE WHEN A MONSTER IS TRYING TO EAT ME, GOING BACK TO THE CHASING BIT PART... WHERE WAS I...OH YEAH, HELLPPPPPPP MEEEEEEEEE, ANYONE!_

James risked looking behind him to see what is chasing him and accidently ran into a tree, knocking himself off his feet, lying on his back on the floor, slowly whatever what was chasing him, was coming!

"POTTER! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING" the monster roared

_"Wow!" _James thought _"a monster that can TALK AND KNOWS MY NAME! THAT TAKES TALENT!_

_James grinned staring at the sky, with the half-moon lit up brighly in the sky. GENIUS MONSTER THAT IS, I'M GOING TO BE RICH IF I TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THE MONSTER, I CAN SEE IT NOW, ATTENTION, GLORY, JENNY SKATER WILL DEFINIATLY GO OUT WITH ME NOW! YESSSSSSSSSSSSS! SO ME AND SKATE- I MEAN JENNY WILL GET TOGETHER AND HAVE LOTS OF JAMES AND JENNYS JUNIORS NOW!_

Suddenly a half-giant of a man was pulling James to his feet, revealing that it wasn't a monster at all chasing James, it was in fact- Hagrid

Suddenly James vision of him and jenny getting together and having loads of James and Jenny juniors exploded in his mind, leaving James very dissapointed

"Hagrid? what are you doing here" James asked

"ME'? YOU SCARE' ME TO' EATH'! ere' I was doin' me' gamekeeping duties and eard a high-pitched scream"_ "Bit girlish if you ask me for a 15 year old boy"_ Hagrid muttered, James glared

"MY scream is not GIRLISH!" James shrieked (girlishly proving Hagrid's point)

Hagrid half-smiled "rite, anywayz hat' you doin' ere, in da forbidde' orest? You' omin' ack to' da' to astle' ith' me' now!" Hagrid grabbed and picked James up and was walking starting to walk back to the castle but James started kicking and squirming so much, that Hagrid dopped him accidently

"OW!" James moaned " I can't- no I WON'T GO BACK, I GOTTA WIN THE BET!" James shouted

Hagrid looked shocked "A BET! ERE' YOU ARE' IN DA OREST' FOR' A SUPID' BET!"

"I know, I'm sorry, but please, I've gotta win the bet!" James said begginly giving Hagrid the puppy-dog eyes

"WOW, YOU DID IT, JAMES, WELL DONE!" everyone cheered in the Great hall today since James did it and camped in the forbidden forest for the night. Everyone was handing away money since they lost or won the bet. It wouldn't have mattered if you screamed at the top of your lungs, you still wouldn't of been heard since everyone was cheering so loud

"WOW! James, we got 700 GALLEONS, WE'RE RICH!" Selena screamed, jumping up and down

"YOU SERIOUS, 700 GALLEONS" Rory shouted looking just as excited as Selena

"NO I BELIVE I AM!" Rory and and Selena rolled their eyes at the pun "I CAN'T BELIEVE WE GOT 700 GALLEONS!" James shouted back

"I KNOW!" Rory and Selena screamed back

LIly and Al were celebrating for the hell of it but were occasionly glaring at James. James caught Jenny looking at James at him with a weird look on her, but when James mouthed "waa" Jenny simply shook it off, smiled and went back to her friends. James grinned, today was really a great day

But what no one ever knew- except Hagrid that James did camp in the forest but, with Hagrid as James' bodygaurd since Hagrid couldn't give in to the puppy-eye look and was naturally too nice to say no. Hagrid also brought a tent and some food(food from the kitchens, not Hagrids rock-cakes) and lit a fire and sat and talked in the tent for hours till they both fell asleep._ Oh James!_

**Don't worry I'm doing the time-travel in the next chapter, I've been building it up, you see, Rose getting her time-turner in the last chapter, and in this chapter James with a "forbidden spells book" which James accidently cast one of the spells while Rose and James are having a tug-of-war with the time-turner, so the forbidden spell and time turner get them to Harry's 5th year. xxxxxxxxxx :)**

**P.S) I honestly tried to get Hagrid to talk the way he does in the book, but when I got to writing it, I had no idea how, sorry xxxxxxxxxxxx**


	6. Letters, Heartbreak and Time Turners

**Letters, Heartbreak and Time Turners**

"WHERE IS MY LETTER!" Proffessor McGonagal screeched one day at breakfast

Everyone stared and then went back to eating their breakfast as they are used to the said proffessor in hysterics because of _*cough cough* James_

Proffesor McGonagal stormed to where James sat on the Griffindor who was eating and talking too loudly to even notice that she was standing there

"...and I was like, whaaat! and then Amy Salmon was like yeahhh, let's go to the closet . And this happened this morning! so I was like yeah, alright, not going to refuse a shag in a closet ain't, I I would have to be pretty crazy to refuse that wouldn't -.."

"hem, hem" Proffesor McGonagal cleared her throat, making James stop in mid-sentence and glancing around noticing for the first time that she was standing there.

"I would hate to to interupt you tell everyone of your erm.. 'shagging' activity-" James waggled his eyebrow grinning. And McGonagal continued "- but er... WHERE DID YOU PUT MY LETTER!" she screeched

James blinked "What letter?"

"MY LETTER! The one I wrote to your parents explaining your behaviour!"

_Ohhh that letter, the one I took_ "My dear Minnie, surely, you can't go around strutting around the place accusing random people of crimes they haven't done, unlike I" he said cooly

Rose snorted. _James always does that. _She thought. _He always go around.. er how he put it 'strutting around the place accusing random people of crimes they haven't done'_. Rose rolled her eyes and smiled

Proffesor McGonagal snorted as well as Rose and rolled her eyes as did many others did on the table

"Riiight, sure you don't" McGonagal said very sarcasticely " Now where is my LETTER!"

"Minnie, Minnie, MInnie, Minnie, MInne-" James emphasised

"Get on with it and STOP calling me MINNIE!" she shouted

James ignored her. "-Minnie, Minnie, Minne, Minnie, Minnie-"

"POTTER!" she screeched

James deciding to best get on with it said "Do you have proof that I stole this said letter"

"Well... no"

"Then what makes you think it was me?"

"When is it never you!"

"But what if it wasn't me _this_ time"

"Who else would steal a letter to MR AND MRS POTTER, about your behaviour, then?"

"Hello! Mr. and Mrs. Potter! They're FAMOUS! Who knows what crazy crap people would do to read a letter from famous people, they obviously didn't know it was about my behaviour, or was just desperate..."

"Well... I have a feeling it was you!"

"A feeling?"

"Yes!"

"Again I go back to my previous comment, do you have proof that it was me?"

"No..."

"Then it wasn't me, wasn't it" James then waved her off and people started to talk amongst themselves, whilst McGonogal was flabbergasted because she has just lost an arguement.

James grinned obviously knowing this and knowing that he _actually _did steal the letter of her desk. McGonogal stumbled and started to walk way, then stopped and spun around obviously debating something.

Jenny Skater, the red-head, James has a crush on, tapped James on the shoulder who just arrived and wasn't aware of what just happened between Mcgonagal and James since she just entered the room.

James turned around to face Jenny. "Jenny! HI! Wha-"

"James" she interupted, and she then dragged James out of his seat and dragged him away about a metre away for some privacy.

Jenny smiling brightly started "Look, this year, I have been having these feelings, and I've been trying to convince myself otherwise but... it's not exactly working and now that I've now accepted it..." Jenny was now smiling even brighter now if it was even possible. " The point is, I will be your... off course if you'll have me... I will be your girlfri-"

Proffesor Mcgonagal who happened to have chosen the wrong time to intterprupt and decideded something shouted out " POTTER, DETENTION FOR-... wait where is he, POTTER!"

"Here!" James shouted, sad that McGonagal happened to have chosen this moment to talk to him since, Jenny was now talking to him without hexing happening to the end of the conversation and was pretty sure that Jenny was asking him out

" Oh!" she spun around to face James and Jenny's current posistion. "DETENTION, for shagging Amy Salmon in the closet this morning!" she said and stormed of the the teachers table. Everyone started cheering at these news except James and Jenny.

Jenny was staring at James now, wasn't actually staring at him, but right through him. James wasn't looking was everyone else, he was staring at Jenny, she looked so dissapointed, sad, heartbroken, depressed, dull and lifeless, he startingly blue eyes weren't startingly anymore but dark and dull, her smile that was a few moments ago was big and bright was long gone and was like she just recieved the worst news in the world, and James could of sworn that there were tears coming out of her eyes. It terrified him.

"Jenny?" James whispered, breaking the unbrearble silence and hoping she will break out of the trance and depressed look

She did break out of the trance and snapped back to reality, shaking her head, but she still looked sad "Sorry, what?" she said chocking back a sob

"You were saying?"

"Oh, right, I was saying erm..."

"You were asking for that you'll be my girlfriend?" he said hopefully

"No! I was asking for... er... to be FRIENDS... Yeah... I'm a girl you see, and to be your friend... a friend who happens to be a girl... I'm fed up with the arguements we have, so I want to be friends" she said, attempting to put on a fake smile but ended up with a grimace, she put out her hand " Friends?" James put out his hand as well and shook Jenny's hand "Friends" he agreed

"Ok! so I'll see you soon... in lessons, right, Bye!" she said stumbling a bit, her face matching her hair since she blushed so much, and rushed out

James sighed, convinced that Jenny was just asking to be friends, _and I thought she was going to ask me out, oh man,... well at least we're friends_ he thought

It's ok! No its isnt ok, her face terrified James, James stormed off to the Griffindor, gloomingly. Once entering the portrait door, he callopsed onto the couch, there was no one in here except Hugo, Lily, Albus who was sitting in a corner talking, they merely glanced at James when he walked in, and the Head Boy

The head boy walked up to James and handed out his hand with an evelope in his hand " James Potter?" James nodded "Look can you give this envelope to your cousin, Rose Weasley, it's about a time-turner, I would give it to her but I can't find her anywhere! Sooo... can you?"

"Sure" James took the envelope

"Thanks mate" the head boy exited the room leaving James, Lily, Hugo, and Albus alone in the common room

_Wait! _James thought_, A TIME-TURNER. I CAN USE THIS TO WIND BACK TIME TO AVOID ME SHAGGING AMY SALMON, regretfully slightly, AND THEN JENNY WILL BE HAPPY AND I'LL NEVER HAVE SEEN THAT LOOK ON JENNY'S FACE, YES!_

James jumped up, fumbling with the envope, ripped, it open, now with the time-turner in his hands, attempted to figure it out. Lily, Hugo, and Albus, who heads snapped up as soon as they heard the words "Time-turner" "Give to Rose", jumped out of their seats towards James

"No, James!" Lily pleaded

"Don't do anything reckless!" Al begged

"Give us the time turner, James!" Hugo shouted

Hugo, Lily and Al both said this at the same time so James had no idea what they said, but said anyway " I have to, it make my Jennykins HAPPY!"

"What!" Al, Hugo and Lily questioned obviously confused

The sound the of the portrait door opened, and Teddy and Rose walked in

"Hey!" they both said at the same time

"James, McGonagal wanted me to tell you that your detention is today at 6, since she forgot to tell you this morning" Teddy said

But no one was listening, Rose was staring at the time-turner in James' hands

"No, James give me that! NOW!" she shouted

"No!" James shouted back and made a leg for it to the 5th year boys dormitory, but Rose was too fast and slammed into James and they both fell to the floor, having a tug-of-war over the time tirner, there was shouts and screams heard as Lily, Hugo, and Al was shouting to "STOP IT, GET OFF EACH OTHER NOW!" and Teddy shouting " WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!" and Rose and James both shouting " GIVE IT TO ME, DROP IT NOW!"

James and Rose both loosened their grip on the time-turner but both still had their grip on it, fighting over it

"JAMES, DROP IT, NOW!"

"NOO, YOU DROP IT"

"YOU" she screeched

"I CAN EASILY MAKE YOU DROP IT YOU KNOW, I FOUND THIS FORBIDDEN SPELL THAT MAKE ANYONE DROP ANYTHING AT ALL SO I CAN JUS-"

"DON'T YOU DARE! IT'S A FORBIDDEN SPELL, AND LET GO OF THE TIME TURNER NOW!"

Lily was attempting to pull James off Rose and Hugo was attempting to pull Rose off James, Al and Teddy stood behind them gaping like a fish, like idiots. With Lily and Hugo pulling at James and Rose, they both released the object with one hand, therefore, only one hand grabbing onto it.

James with his free hand, pulled out his want and shouted the forbidden spell, aiming for Rose's hand, making her drop it, but his aim was a bit off with the pushing and shoving and hit his hand as well therefore resulting in James and Rose releasing their grip on it at the same time, dropping it, but with the sudden movement, the chain containing the time-turner snapped sending the time-turner flying across the room

*SMASH*

All sudden movement stopped, staring at it as if their life depended on it. The golden sand was pouring out of it and then the room started to turn gold and the black since the lights turned off.

"WHATS HAPPENING!" Rose shouted

"WHY'S IT GONE DARK!" Al Shouted

"WHAT THE- WAIT, WHAT?" James stopped realising what Al said "AWWWW, IS MY ICKLE LITTLE BROTHER AL SCARED OF THE DARK, AWWWWW WANT A HUG FROM YOUR BIG BROTHER JAMES! SOO CUT-..."

"ARGH, PISS OFF, JAMES!" Al shouted, annoyed

"BUT WHY HAS IT GONE DARK?" Hugo asked

"AWWW, IS HUGO SCARED AS WELL OF THE DARK, DO YOU WANT A HUG, DO YOU WANT YOUR BIG SISTER ROSE TO GIVE YOU A HUG-! James coed, jokingly

"SHUT UP!" Rose, Al, Hugo, Lily, Teddy shouted

"I'M SCARED!" LIly shouted

"LILY! COME HERE" James shouted. Lily obeyed following James voice and bumped into him, James put his arms around Lliy, hugging her, keeping her calm

" OH YEAH, DON'T TEASE LILY, BUT WHEN IT'S HUGO OR ME YOU SKITT AND TEASE US, DON'T YOU" Al said sarcasticely

"YEAH!" Hugo agreed. Rose and Teddy rolled their eyes in the dark, clearly getting annoyed

"THAT'S DIFFERENT, I _ACTUALLY_ LIKE LILY UNLIKE YOU TWO SOPPY BABIE WHO-"

""SHUT UP!" Rose yelled

"SHUT THE HELL UP!" Teddy yelled

Then the next second, they started becoming transparent and then James, Al, Lily, Rose, Hugo and Teddy vanished like they were apparating.

**Review Please! :) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**


	7. Overused 'Serious' puns, Grandma's and S

**Overused 'Serious' puns, Grandma's and Santa Claus**

The Order had just finished dropping Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Fred and George at Hogwarts, since the christmas holidays have now finished, and now Sirius, Remus, Tonks, Molly, and Snape had just got back into Grimauld place, walking into the kitchen. Snape waited till Sirius changed back from Padfoot into human form.

"Black, you are officially an idiot!"

"Pfft! look whos talking! The guy who has never, and I mean _NEVER_ heard of shampoo!" Sirius shot back. Remus snorted, Sirius looked sideways at Remus, looking satsified and happy with his joke.

"_Oh, ha ha, very amusing! _But is is like you are begging to get captured from the ministy!"

Sirius opened has mouth to retort something back to Snape, and Molly opened her mouth to tell them to stop argueing but a a crash from the other room, and yelling stopped them, unfortinately the crash and yelling had woken up Sirius' mother

"MUDBLOODS, FILTHLY HALF-BREEDS, ABOMINATION OF MY FLESH-" the rest got cut off as Sirius and Remus both whipped out their wands silencing her with the _silenco _spell and closed the curtains, shushing her.

"LILY, MOVE YOUR ARSE!" Sirius and Remus tensed at at the name of their dead best friends' wife

"I CAN'T, HUGO IS ON ME!"

"ROSE, GET OFF MY FOOT!"

"HUGO! GET OFF MY HEAD!"

"YOUR _HEAD?_! SORRY!"

"ARGH! SOMEONE'S LEG IS ON MY EAR! ARGH!"

"SORRY, JAMES! THAT WAS ME!" Sirius and Remus tensed again, at the name of their dead best friend

There was a lot of stumbling and shouting, then finally the future generation fell into the next room, on top of each other into the kitchen. The Potters, Weasleys and Teddy struggled on their feet, stumbling and tripping, muttering "ow, ow, ow!" over and over again.

"Who are you!" Tonks, Remus and Molly shouted, pointing their wands at them

"OMG! DEAD PEOPLE ARE COMING BACK TO HAUNT ME!" Al, Rose and Hugo shouted, Al pointing and Sirius, Hugo pointing at Remus and Rose pointing at Tonks. Everyone else except Molly and the people getting pointed at, rolled their eyes.

"Er..." Sirius, Remus and Tonks said akwardly

"We are not dead" Remus said

"Yeah" Tonks agreed

"Do we look dead to you!" Sirius said rather rudely

"_Sirius_!" Molly hissed

"I guess not" Al, Rose and Hugo muttered, looking down, embarrassed. James snorted

"Yo, Grandma!" James said, cheerfully, waving at Molly. Molly froze as did Sirius, Remus and Tonks did as well.

"What?" Molly whispered

"I said hey, can I have something to eat, I'm starving" James said not realizining that Molly is looking younger then he last saw her.

"You called me _Grandma_" Molly said, it wasnt a question, it was a fact

"Yeah! because you our grandma" Lily said looking confused

"Yeah, well apart from Teddy, here" Hugo said, pointing at Teddy

"But I don't have any-" Molly stuttered

"Aright, who are you!" Tonks asked. Teddy froze, realising who this woman is, since he seen her in the pictures, Teddy also realised Remus in the room, in a room with his _mother_ and _father_, impossible, beacuse they're dead, they died at the battle of Hogwarts.

"Er... what year is?" Teddy asked

"2020" James answered

"Not you!"

"2020? eh, kid, its 1996!" Sirius said looking confused

Rose gasped, realising what happened

"Your not new recruits of death eaters, are you?" Snape asked, talking the first time since the children came

"No, we are not death dancers!" Hugo shouted, offended

"Death Dancers?" Remus, asked amused " It's 'death eaters' not 'death dancers'"

"Death Dancers!" Sirius, burst out laughing "That's a good one! EH, Moony?"

Remus ignored him, Teddy tensed confirming it that he is in fact, Remus Lupin

"Moony! Moony! Moony! Moony! Remus! Remus!"

"What!"

"Guess what?"

Sighing, Remus replied "What?"

"Did you know that my brother, Regulus, was a 'death dancer', delightful club that is, you dance people to death but since-"

"_Sirius_!" Molly interupted

James gasped, "_Sirius_? That's your name, that's my middle name!" James said excitedly, not realizing that he is, in fact, Sirius Black

"Your middle name is Sirius?" Sirius asked, smiling, just as excited

"Yeah, best name ever, I can always use that 'serious' joke, awesome!"

"I know, yeah!" Sirus said, cheerfully and high-fived James

"Er..." Everyone said akwardly

"You two can not be serious" Snape said

Sirius and James looked at each other and grinned "Actually, yes we are!"

Everyone except Sirius and James groaned

Rose speaking for the first time " Did you say it's 1996?"

"Yeah"

"OMG!"

"WHAT?" Everyone asked now panicked

"I think we're are in the past" At everyones confused looks, continued

"We were in 2020, but now you guys said it's 1996, before we came her, this idiot-" she said pointing at James " and me broke a time turner and he-" pointing at James again " used a forbidden spell that I think has got us into the past to 1996!"

Everyone gasped now, realising what has happened

"So you kids, are from the future, to be presice, 2020!" Tonks said

"Yeah, guess so" the kids muttered, and nodded

"I'll go get Dumbledore!" Tonks said running out the room. A second later-

*smash*

"TONKS!" Molly shouted

"I'm sorry, I didn't see the table in the middle of the room" Tonks shouted from the other room, 5 seconds later the fireplace was heard going off.

"Wait a minute!" If you kids are from the 2020, then are you kids my grandkids!" Molly said, happy at the news.

"Why do think they are your grandchildren?" Sirius asked

"They called me grandma before, and this one-" she said pointing at Al "- said that all of them except Teddy, I think that's his name "-she said pointing at Teddy.

"Yeah" Teddy said

"HELLO GRANDMA" the children except Teddy shouted

Molly smiled brightly, in tears. Sirius and Remus looked at each other and shared amused grins, Snape looked as bored as hell. Molly was just about to run the the kids and hug them but the sound of the fireplace went off.

Dumbledore and Tonks walked in the room

"Omg! look! _Dumbledore!" _James hissed to Al and Sirius

Al rolls his eyes whilst Sirius looks confused. James starts singing

_"Here comes Santa Claus!  
>Here comes Santa Claus!<br>Right down Santa Claus Lane!  
>Vixen and Blitzen and all his reindeer-"<em>

Sirius realizes what James is doing and bursts out laughing, Hugo joins in too. Rose looks irrated that James would do such a thing. Lily & Tonks start giggling, Teddy, Remus and Dumbledore look amused. Al shook his head and laughs at his brothers idiocy. Snape does not look amused one little bit and is looking livid. Molly is laughing a bit since she is used to this from Fred and George

_"-are pulling on the reins.  
>Bells are ringing, children singing;<br>All is merry and bright.  
>Hang your stockings and say your prayers,<br>'Cause Santa Claus comes tonight._

_Here comes Santa Claus!  
>Here comes Santa Claus!<br>Right down Santa Claus Lane!  
>He's got a bag that is filled with toys<br>for the boys and girls again.  
>Hear those sleigh bells jingle jangle,<br>What a beautiful sight.  
>Jump in bed, cover up your head,<br>'Cause Santa Claus comes toniggghhtttttt!"_

Sirius is into fits of laughter whilst some of the others are laughing as well

"Are you quite done, yet?" Snape asks deadpanned

"Quite!" James replied

"Why thank you for that amusing Christmas song" Dumbledore says to James. Snape stares at Dumbledore shocked. "You are the first to do that"

"As I am to many things" James replied cheekily. Dumbledore chuckled

"Nymphadora, came to my office in Hogwarts to tell me that 7 kids from the future, 2020 to be precise has come to Grimmauld place" Dumbledore said, Tonks scowled and wrinkled her nose as the headmaster using her first name.

Dumbledore continued " Is that correct?" Everyone in the room nodded apart from Dumbledore

Right, well I have a question?" Dumbledore says

"Alright shoot" Al says

"Who are you?"

**Please review!**


	8. Moony! We're family!

**TONKS AND REMUS= TEDDY! MOONY! WE'RE FAMILY!**

"Right, so do we just introduce ourselves?" Teddy asked

"_Never_" Al said sarcasicely " Nooo! even though Proffesor Dumbledore just asked us who we are

Teddy rolled his eyes, and Hugo snorted

Teddy looked around the room. Trying to recognise who the people are: teddy's godfather's godfather is here, Sirius Black, his mum and dad, Snape and Molly Weasely

"Wouldn't this effect the future or something?" he asked

"Teddy! Stop being so cautious and just tell them!" Al said

Everyone from the future stared at Al

"What?" Al asked

"Never thought I'd hear Al say that" James muttered

"Come on, tell us! Please! Sirius pleaded, giving Teddy the puppy-dog eyes, which wasn't so hard since his animagous form is a dog

Dumbledore sat down watching Teddy, Sirius sat down as well, as well did Tonks, Remus and Molly. Snape stayed standing up, looking bored

"Ok, right. Well my name is Teddy-

"POOPIN" James cut in shouting " Teddy Poopin!"

Everyone from the future burst out laughing, Teddy turned his head to glare at James

Sirius let out a bark-of-laughter and started laughing. Tonks, Remus and Molly looked like they were having a hard time to keep a straight-face to not laugh to be polite. Snape smirked

"_POOPIN_!" Sirius shouted laughing

"ARGH!" Remus shouted "SIRIUS! Not so loud!"

"Oh, right, sorry, forgot about your super-hearing!" Sirius apoligised, still laughing

"_Sirius_! Stop laughing! Stop being so rude!" Molly scolded

Sirius immediately stopped laughing seeing Molly's face, and attempted to cover it up with coughing, Molly rolled her eyes.

"Poopin! Are you serious! Oh wait- that's me!" Sirius laughed at his own joke, weakly, and James laughed at it since that's the joke he does.

"Your surname isn't actually_ Poopin_? Is it? Sirius asked

"No! He's just being a git!" Teddy said annoyed, pointing at James

"Oh! Good! Cos no offense but I would feel sorry for you, if it was" Sirius said, chuckling

Dumbledore chuckled " Right, well your real surname, if you please!"

Teddy glared at James again as if to tell to to keep his mouth shut, James smiled telling him to 'go'

"My name is Teddy Lupin!" Teddy announced

Remus who chose that unfortunate time to sip his tea, spat it out, shocked. Sirius smirked out his friends' actions

"_Lupin_?"

"Yes, _Lupin_, didnt you hear him, Moony! Sirius said smirking still

"Wha...-" Remus stuttered

"Moony, you old dog" Sirius joked. "So, Teddy _Lupin, _who's your mother"

When Sirius asked Teddy who's the mother, Tonks smile faltered, dissapointed, she didn't know why since all she has on Remus is a crush, only a crush, and he went and settled for another girl! Tonks was furious and jealous, her bubble-gum hair had changed to blood-red, when she's angry goes like this

Sirius who noticed this " My dear Nmphie, whatever is the matter, your hair has changed to an angry red" Sirius said cooly and slyly, grinning

"Nothing" Tonks muttered, trying to change her hair back to bubble-gum pink but did not work. Tonks noticed Remus looking at her, looking apoligetic(dunno how that works since he hasn't done it, yet since it's the future but still)

Sirius turned back to Teddy, eyeing Teddy's turqoise hair. "So... who is your mother"

"Nymphadora Tonks!" Teddy said happily

Remus who took another sip of his tea, to try to help him think, spat it out again, Sirius snorted at his friends actions, again

"WHAT!" Tonks and Remus shouted

Sirius let out a bark-of-laughter. He knew that they liked each other, and was hoping that they would get together

Tonks was shocked that she is this kids no,Teddys mother, and Remus, the father. Tonks smiled happy, her hair going bubble-gum pink, from blood-red

Remus, was shocked that Tonks would go him, she's 13 years younger then him, and he's too poor and a werewolf

Sirius was laughing, Molly was smiling, happy for them. Snape was glaring, unable to believe it, the future gen was also laughing and Teddy was grinning. Tonks smiled brightly unable to believe it. Remus was still creeped out at finding out that he will have a son and didn't feel quite ready to talk to him properly yet.

"WAIT A SECOND!" Sirius shouted

"Argh! SIRIUS! Stop yelling" Remus shouted at him, finally out of his shock, and slowly regaining colour

"Sorry" Sirius apoligised "I just realised something, Tonks is my cousin!"

Everybody stared at Sirius

"Well done, for realising that, Padfoot"

"NO!" Sirius shouted, ignoring Remus' glare for him yelling again

"Tonks and Remus= Teddy!" Sirius said, happily

"Everybody once again stared at Sirius

"Well done for realising how babies are made, Padfoot"

Everybody laughed

"NO!" Sirius shouted once again ignoring Remus' glare for him yelling once again

"If Tonks and Remus= Teddy, then... MOONY! WE'RE FAMILY!" Sirius yelled, happily and started jumping around

Everybody laughed at Sirius' actions.

"Alright, next introdruction" Dumbledore said, still chuckling

Rose and Hugo stepped up

**Please Review! :D**


	9. Ron and Hermione? I knew it!

**Ron and Hermione? I Knew it!**

Rose and Hugo stepped up

Dumbledore nodded at them

"My name is Hugo-

"WHEATLY!" James cut in "Hugo Wheatly

Everyone from the future except Hugo and James snorted. Hugo glared at James

"Wheat! Isn't that er... food or something, like for weetabix" Sirius questioned out loud

"Weetabix! That reminds me! I'M STARVING! I asked Grandma Molly for food earlier but I don't think she realised because I called her grandma of something like that" James shouted

"OOH! Molly if you're making food for him, then can you make food for me too please, oh and make some for Remus, too, he's looking a bit weak, personally I think it's near his _'time of the month'_" Sirius said, whispering the last three words. Remus glared at Sirius

"OH! Food! Don't worry, I'll go make some-" Molly says but Dumbledore interupts her

"Molly, after, when we have finished the introductions"

"Oh right!"

"My surname isn't Wheatley!" Hugo says heatingly

"Oh, what is it then?" Tonks asks

"It's _Weasley!_" Hugo says "Hugo Weasley!"

A second of silence

"I have a Grandson!" Molly shouts, crying

Everyone laughs at Mollys' actions, well except Snape

Sirius lets out a bark of laughter "Oh, Molly!"

Tonks giggles "Who's your parents? Is the Dad Bill or Percy or Charlie or Fred or George or-"

"Isn't it obvious!" Snape says deadpanned

"Oh shut it, Snape! You're ruining the fun!" Sirius says

"So, who's your parents?" Tonks says, ignoring Snape and Sirius altogether

"I'll tell you when Rose introduces herself" Hugo tells her

Everyone except the future gen and Snape groaned

"Awww, we want to know now!" Tonks says dissapointed

Hugo laughs "Well I was born in 2008, I'm in my 2nd year of Hogwarts and Rose here, is my big sister and my only sibling" Rose smiles

"So, yeahh, that's me!" Hugo says

Everyone laughs

"Ok, now Roses' introduction" Hugo says

Rose steps further then Hugo, took a deep breathe, looking at everyone's face and started to introduce herself

My name is Rose-

"SEX!" James shouted

Everybody stared at James

"Rose' name is Rose Sex!" James repeated

"Sex!" Roses' surname is_ Sex_! OMG!" Sirius shouted letting out a bark-of-laughter

Rose blushed furiosly, and glared at James

Everybody burst out laughing

"Wow! They actually believe James, wouldn't it be obvious it's not since Hugo said Rose is his big sister and Hugo's surname is 'Weasley'" Al whispers to Teddy

Teddy shrugs his shoulders "Yeah, well..." he chuckled

"Speaking of sex, i haven't had sex in 14years" Sirius muttered

Remus, which his super-hearing and near the full-moon heard "14years! Padfoot did you just say you haven't had sex in 14years!"

"Oh crap, forgot about your super-hearing, er... no, no, no, that's ridicoulous, Moony, why would you think that"

"Because you just said, wait a minute, _14 years_!" Remus said heatingly

"Shhhhh! Don't say that out so loud!" Sirius begged

"Oh, no, no, no. The amount of times I asked you to be quite about stuff and 5seconds later, you announced it in the great hall, at Hogwarts, but wait a second, did you say that _YOU HAVEN'T HAD SEX IN 14 YEARS_!"

"I miss the times when I just said the word "_sex_" you just blushed and got all embarassed! Be quite, Moon-" Sirius hissed

"WAIT A SECOND, DID REMUS JUST SAY SIRIUS HASN'T HAD SEX IN 14 YEARS" James shouted

Everybody stopped laughing and stared at Sirius

"Have I ever told you, that I hate you, Moony!" Sirius muttered

"Plenty of times, you know you love me really" Remus said, with a satisfied and smug smile on his face

"14 years, Sirius! REALLY!" Tonks asked

"Well it's not like it's my fault, i was in azkaban for 12 years and-"

"Why didn't you have sex in azkaban?" Lily asked innocently

"Yeah, Sirius, why didnt you?" Everyone asked

Sirius who was blushing furiously, embarrassed replied " I was in top security cell, with _no one _else, I couldnt exactly go around-"

"If you escaped from azkaban, then you can escape a cell just to go have sex in a different cell" Molly said

"Molly!" Sirius whined " _Now_, you decide to side with someone else" When no one said anything, he continued

"Well, for your answer, I'm not exactly going to er... sleep with people who are mainly Death Eaters am I"

Everybody looked blankly at Sirius

"Well I was really lucky to escape from azkaban and-"

"You could of just escaped from you cell in Padfoot form to someone else's cell'" Lily said

"Yeah, well, I'm an illegell animagous! I'm not going to-"

"You already had a life in azkaban so would it have really mattered wether they knew, and now if you get caught you get the dementors kiss" Lily said

"Or... you could of found another dog and had sex with the dog!" James said helpfully

"I'm not going to sleep with a _dog!" _

"Why?" James whined

"We are different species!"

"No your not if you change into Padfoot!" Lily said

"My _Original_ Species!"

"Yeah but-..."

The rest got drawn out as Lily, James and Sirius started argueing over each other

"How did we come up with a conversation about _sex and dogs!_" Al questioned to no one in particular

Remus, Dumbledore and Snape were looking amused, Tonks and Molly were silently laughing, and Teddy, and Al were smiling, nearly laughing

"No, no, no and I repeat, never, and I mean NEVER having _sex_ with a _dog!" _Sirius shouted

"Why don't you want doggie-sex" Lily questioned

"Yeah! Might be fun and different!" James said brightly

"Why dont you try it then"

"I'm not a dog!" James said heatingly

"Neither am I!" Sirius said heatingly back

"Your animagus form is a _dog!"_ Lily shouted

"What is your point, I was born, not into a dog, but into a human being!" Sirius shouted back

"But you can still change into a dog!" James yelled

"What is your point!" Sirius asked

"My point is that you can sleep with dogs!"

"NO! I'm not having sex with dogs!"

"Why not?"

"I just told you and if you're moaning so much you go and sleep with dogs!"

"But I'm not a dog though" James said

"Neither am I!" Lily shouted

"But you can change into a dog though!" Lily and James said

"But..."

"HAHA, YOU MUST BE SCARED!" James shouted

"SCARED! OF WHAT!"

"Having sex with dogs!" Lily supplied

"WHAT'S SO SCARY ABOUT HAVING SEX WITH DOGS!"

"I DUNNO!" James shouted

"YOU TELL US!" Lily shouted

"YOU CAME UP WITH THE QUESTION!" Sirius shouted

"It wasn't techichnly a question" Lily said

"Yeah, it was a fact!"

"Whatever! The fact is that I'm not going to have sex with DOGS!"

"WHY" Lily and James asked

"I JUST TOLD YOU, I SWEAR IT'S LIKE TRYING TO TALK TO 5YEARS OLDS I'D HAVE BETTER LUCK, HELL, I'LL HAVE BETTER LUCK WITH MY BROTHER, REGULUS THEN THE TWO OF YOU!"

"YOU HAVEN'T ASNWERED OUR QUESTION!" Lily and James shouted

"WHAT QUESTION!"

"WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO HAVE DOGGIE-SEX!" James and Lily said at the same time

Sirius looked like he was about to scream, but Dumbledore noticed and stopped the conversation.

"Why, don't we stop this _amusing _arguement on get back to what we were doing!" Dumbledore said

"Amusing! It's not amusing! It's-..." Sirius said heatingly

"Please, Sirius!" Dumbledore said

"14 years, Black. Really?" Snape asked. Sirius turned his head to glare at Snape

"Well at least I've done_ it, _unlike some people, Snape! When did you lose your virginity! _NEVER_!" Sirius shot at him

"Sirius-" Dumbledore pleaded

"No, no, no, wait a second. I just asked him a question. When was the last time you've done _it!" _Sirius said glaring at Snape.

Snape turned a shade of red, embarrassed "Movin on, we're doing the next introduction after we just introduced the girl 'Rose Sex'" Snape muttered

Sirius snorted and coughed something that sounded like *_36 year old virgin_* now having a smug and satfisied smile on his face and Snape glared at Sirius

"My surname is not sex!" Rose said heatingly

"But he just said-" Molly said pointing at James

"He is an idiot, you know with Hugo and Teddy we used the most stupidist surnames for his own amusement!"

Sirius and Snape glared at James

"I could of kept my 'not having sex for 14 years' a secret" Sirius muttered "and he-" pointing at Snape "could of kept his '36 year old virgin' a secret, ah well, kinda of funny if you think about it" Sirius said out loud, now chuckling. Snape shot Sirius a dirty look.

"Ok, then, Rose, your_ real _surname if you please" Dumbledor said

"Rose Weasley!" Rose said hurriedly to make sure James doesn't come up with any other ridicoulous surnames

A second of silence

"I have a grandaughter!" Molly shouted, in tears of hapyness

Everyone laughs

"Hello, Grandma" Rose walks up to Molly and hugs her, and Molly hugs her back happily

"Awww" Tonks coed whilst Remus, Sirius and Snape rolled their eyes

Rose pulled away, tears in her own eyes and wiped the tears away continued "I was born in 2006 and I'm in my 4th year in Hogwarts and Hugo is my little brother" she finished

"So... the next people" she said pushing James, Al and Lily ahead

"WAIT!" Sirius shouted

"PADFOOT! STOP YELLING!" Remus shouted

"Sorry! You haven't told us who your parents are!" Sirius said quietly looking at Remus, who rolled his eyes

"Oh, right!" Rose shouted

Molly was nervously waiting happily seeing who's son of hers is the father to Rose and Hugo.

"Our parents are Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley!" Rose said,watching their reactions very carefully

"RON AND HERMIONE! I KNEW IT!" Sirius shouted ignoring Remus' glare for screaming his head off

Molly was jumping for joy, she knew the two of them would be together. Tonks was laughing as she knew it too. Dumbledore and Remus was smiling.

Snape had a smug smile of his face, he knew the kids was Grangers, as with the bushy hair on Rose, and as Rose looks like Hermione and Ron in one person.

The future gen were laughing at everyone's reactons.

Once everyone had calm down. Dumbledore nodded his head at James, Al, and Lily, silently teling them to "go".

**Please Review :D xxxxx**


	10. Harry and Ginny! I also knew that!

**HARRY AND GINNY! I ALSO KNEW THAT!**

Lily stepped forward, nervously.

"Hello, my name is Lily!" Lily said cheerfully

Sirius and Remus looked at each other and nodded "HI, LILY!" they shouted

Molly smiled at her grandaughter "What's your surname, dear?"

"Oh, right sorry, forgot" Lily laughed nervously

"I'm Lily Potter!" Lily said more cheerfully

A second later

"_POTTER_!" Snape shouted scaring Lily to death. Rose, James, Al, and Teddy snorted at Snapes reaction

"_SEVERUS_!" Molly scolded

"Potter?" Sirius questioned

"Potter? Potter for like Harry Potter?" Tonks asked. Snape rolled his eyes

"Are you related to Harry Potter?" Remus asked

Lily nodded enthuasticly "Yeah, he's me Dad!"

A second later

"HARRY HAS DAUGHTER! WHO DID MY GODSON KNOCK UP, HE'S ONLY 15, HE SHOULDN'T-" Sirius shouted but Remus interupted

"PADFOOT! SHE'S FROM THE FUTURE! SHE GETS BORN IN... what year did you get born in, Lily?"

"2008" Lily answered

"SEE! 2008! SHE'S FROM THE FUTURE!" Remus resumed shouting at him

"Oh yeah!" Sirius said now more calm

Rose, Al, Hugo, James and Teddy burst out laughing silently

Molly, Tonks, Snape, and Remus snorted and rolled their eyes

"Wow! Can't believe that my godson has a daughter!" Sirius says

"That's because Harry is only 15 now, Padfoot" Remus says

"Yeah, but still!"

"I can't believe that Potter brat produces!" Snape sneered

Sirius snorted "At least he will have kids, unlike some _people_" coughing something that sounds like *_36 year old virgin_*

Snape glared at him throwing him a filthy look

"I HAVE A GRANDAUGHTER!" Molly shouted. Everyone laughed

"Aww and it was so sweet that Harry named his daughter after his mother" Tonks and Molly coed

Sirius and Remus rolled their eyes

"I'm not just named after Grandma Lily" Lily says

"Who else you named after?" Molly asks sweetly

"Luna Scamanda well I think it Lovedgood now!"

"Lovegood? These aren't one those false funny surnames is it? Cos Lovegood, love him real good... or her depending whether she's a lesbian or not!" Sirius says

"_Sirius_!"

"No, her maiden name is lovegood, Luna Lovegood!" Lily says

"Oh!" Sirius snorts

"_Sirius_!"

"So your name is Lily Luna Potter" Tonks says, it wasn't a question but a fact

"Who's Luna Lovegood?" Remus asks

"A good friend of my Mum and Dad's" Lily tells him

"OHHH! WHO'S YOUR MOTHER!" Sirius shouts, Sirius looks sideways at Remus who figured that he might as well give up telling Sirius to be quite

"My mum's name is-"

"Ginny!" Molly shouts

Everyone looks at her confused

"Lily looks a lot like Ginny, and Lily looks exactly like Ginny did when Ginny was younger!" Molly explained

"Oh yeah" Everyone says except Snape and the future gen

"Harry and Ginny, you say" Sirius asks says

"Yeah" Lily answered

"As in Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley?" Sirius asks

"Yes" Lily repeated

"She just said that, Padfoot!" Remus tells Sirius

"No, she didn't, she didn't say her mum's surname"

"But Molly just pratically-"

"_Sirius! Remus_!" Molly hissed

Remus and Sirius fell silent. Teddy grinned.

"Harry and Ginny sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love then comes marriage then come Lily in a baby carriage!" Sirius sings

Everyone bursts out laughing except Snape

"HARRY AND GINNY! I ALSO KNEW THAT!" Sirius shouts

"REALLY, PADFOOT?" Remus asks

"NO! BUT MOVING ON!" Sirius shouts

Remus snorted. So Sirius continued

"I thought at first that Harry and Ginny would get together, but whenever I see Harry and Ginny in the same room, it's obvious that Harry doesn't see her that way" Sirius explained

"Oh!" Remus says

"Huh? So how does it happen?" Molly asks

"The sex?" Sirius says "It's quite obvious how sex happens, you all of all people should know that since you have 7children but..."Sirius shrugs "i'll explain to you how-"

"NOT THE SEX!" Molly shouted blushing furiosly, plus with the image of her daughter and Harry together now

"Oh, what do you mean then?" Sirius asks

"How do Ginny and Harry get together!" Molly shouts

"Oh!" Sirius says now understood. Everyone rolled their eyes

"They might not be together you know, Harry and Ginny might of had a drunken one-time thing once and unfurtonately got Ginny knocked up and-" Sirius continued

"Thank you, Sirius!" Molly shouts, clearly saying 'shut-up' and in a very sarcastic tone. Sirius fell silent

"Dad says he started falling for Mum, in his sixth year" Lily explained

"Oh!" Everyone says

"Sixth year, huh? Harry is in his fith year now, so one more year" Remus says. Everyone nodded

Molly was smiling with happines, she always liked Harry and is very happy that Ginny and Harry get together, she had been hoping for ages that they would, and plus Harry become her son-in-law, and also Hermione who becomes her daughter-in-law.

"I'm in my 2nd year of Hogwarts, I was born in 2008 and I'm in Gryfindor!" Lily finished

"WOOO! GRYFINDOR!" Sirius cheered

"What house is Teddy, Rose and Hugo in" Remus asks

"Oh, yeah, we forgot!" Hugo says

"Rose and Hugo are all in Gryffindor, I was in Gryfindor as well" Teddy tells them

Everyone nodded "WOOO! GRYFINDOR! THE BEST HOUSE IN THE WORLD!" Sirius cheers. Everyone rolled their eyes

"OI! What about me!" Tonks says "I was in HUFFLEPUFF!"

"Oh, right!" Sirius says "Ah, well, sorry Tonksie but... WOOO! GRYFFINFOR! THE BEST HOUSE IN THE WORLD!"

Tonks laughed and rolled her eyes

"Ok! Me next!" Al shouted, and jumped up from his sitting position

"My name is Al Potter!" Al says

"_POTTER_!" Snape sneered

"_SEVERUS_!" Molly scolded

"WOOO! ANOTHER POTTER!" Sirius cheered

"I HAVE ANOTHER GRANDSON!" Molly shouted

Everyone laughed

"I can't believe that Potter brat produces _twice_!" Snape shouted, sneering

Sirius snorted but ignored him this time

"You have your Grandma's eyes" Remus says

"I get that all the time except people tell me that I have my Dad's eyes!"

Tonks laughed "They're the same, Harry got his mum's eyes, and you inherited Harry's eyes that were originally from Lily... if that makes sense" Tonks says lost in thought

Al laughed "Yeah! Well anyway, I'm in my 4th year at Hogwarts, I was born in 2006 and I'm in Gryffindor!"

Sirius cheered at hearing Al is in Gryffindor. Tonks rolled her eyes at Sirius but cheered as well.

"Ok, me next!" James says standing up, from his sitting position, jumping up

Everyone nodded at James

**Please review! :D xxx**


	11. James Sirius Potter

**James **_**Sirius**_** Potter**

"Ok, me next!" James says standing up, from his sitting position, jumping up

Everyone nodded at James

Rose started whispering to Hugo, and Hugo started to pale at what his sister was saying

"My name is James-"

"What no! You can't do that, Rose... you're EVIL!" Hugo shouted at his sister

"WHO IS EVIL!" Sirius shouted

"Sirius! Oh for the love... argh! I knew I shouldn't have let you have all of that sugar before" Remus moaned

Sirius smirked

"You know its lucky this place has a dissilment-whatever charm placed in this house because with all this shouting that has been going on, we would have been spotted ages ago and Black would be getting shipped back to azkaban or might possibly get the dementors kiss" Snape muttered to himself

"No one is evil...it's just Hugo being a little over-dramatic about something" Rose explained. Hugo glared at his sister

Dumbledore chuckled but it was clear he was getting annoyed with all the interruptions. Usually it takes about 5mins or less to get 6 people to introduce him and looking at the clock on the wall... it has been 45mins so far

"Ok, James, if you please!" Dumbledore sighed

"It's Potter!" James says

At everyone's blank faces, James sighed

"My name is James Potter"

A second later

"_POTTER_!" Snape snarled

"Will you _stop_ doing that Severus! Because _seriously_!" Molly scolded

"WHOOOOO! ANOOOTHER POTTER!" Sirius cheered

"Potter produced _three_ times!" Snape said in disbelief

"I get another grandson!" Molly happily says

"WHOOO!" Sirius oddly cheered again, probarly from all the sugar that Remus said he has had

"Does anyone have Harry and Ginny's number because I want to phone them to congratulate them on three kids... and while you're at it, Ron and Hermione's number as well" Sirius asked loudly clearly not thinking straight

"Brilliant idea, Black, they are 14-15 year olds but you want to congratulate them _now _when these children are born in the future! _I applaud you_!"

"OH SHUT IT!"

"Are you drunk, Padfoot?"

"I BECOOOME A GREAT-GODFATHER!" Sirius shouts very loudly

"THAT'S NOT EVEN A WORD!" Remus shouts back

"Everyone, SHUT IT!" Tonks shouted over everyone

Everyone fell silent. Tonks blushed, her hair going red to match ther embarresment

"Er...maybe we should let James finish introducing himself" Tonks suggested

"Great idea" Everyone even Snape agreed

"...Er... well as you already know my name is James Sirius Potter, I was born in 2005, I'm in fith year the same as my dad in this time timeline, and I love Quittich and pranking! James finished dramatically

"GREAT!" Sirius cheered " Well having the name _'Sirius' _in your name, must make you an aweome person!"

Remus and Tonks rolled their eyes at their cousin/best friends idiocy and making a mental note to them to '_never...under any circumstances give food to Sirius with a lot sugar in it'_

James grinned

"Now, that is out of the way! FOOD! Grandma, can we have some food now, please!" James asked

Molly snapped out of her trance "FOOD! YES, of course" and she hurried to the kitchen

"Yeah, lets go the dining room and we could talk more!" Sirius suggested

Everyone agreed loudly and walked to the dining room


	12. James and Al's 'farfetched' Explanation

**James and Al's 'far-fetched' Explanations**

Molly had cooked a lot of food for everyone much to everyones pleasurement. Remus refused politely to eat anything at first but after Sirius had glared at him changed his mind quickly. Snape wasn't hungry so he had a drink

"So, would you care to explain how you got here?" Dumbledore questioned after about fifteen minutes of everyone stuffing their faces

James nodded with mouth stuffed full with food

"Yeah, 'ure" he says spraying food everywhere much to the disgust of Snape.

Sirius was too busy shoveling food down, Remus was used to this as he shared a dorm with Sirius and Peter(Sirius hates to admit that is a simarity that he and Peter used to do) for seven years. And the future gen were also used to this. Tonks and Molly both griamaced.

"Swallow your food" Molly scolds him

James obeyed, swallowing loudly "Sorry, Grandma"

Molly's heaty swelled up, she still isn't used to this, well they have only been here about an hour

"Well..." drawled James...

_**flashback**_

"Hello Teddy, dear godbrother!" exclaimed James happily. "I was about to take the liberty of giving Rose her dear time-turner that I got told to deliver. Would you care to join me in this joyous task?"

"No!" he snapped "I have better things to do than spend my valuable time helping _you _with your silly and childish motives."

"Are you sure beloved godbrother? We would be doing Rose a favour." He smiled happily once more

"I said _no! _Now get lost you slimy prat!"

"I was only trying to be they lovely godbrother and cousin I am and express my love to the you-"

But just then, Teddy flew off the couch and pounced on top of James. He then started viciously attacking the poor boy with a pillow-

_**End Flashback**_

"No, no, _NO-_that is certainly _not _what happened!" growled Teddy in frustration. "_This_ is what happened..."

_**Flashback**_

"I was on my way to the common room to tell James his detention starts at 6, taking Rose with me while she told me James seemed intersted in the time-turner so Rose and I asked Al to watch over James through our two-way mirrors that we made"

_**End Flashback**_

"Wait... two way-mirrors? You and Al made two-way mirrors?" Sirius asked

"Please, Sirius, no interruptions"

Teddy ignored them. "Well Al didn't seem to be doing a good job of watching him as we're now in 1996" he muttered

Al heard this and glared at him. "Hey!" he cried

"Well we told you watch over him!" Teddy cried back

"Wait, wait! Hold your Hypogriff, Ted. You and Rose _forced _me to watch him..."

_**Flashback**_

"_Imperio!" _cried two voices as they pointed their wands to the poor and defenseless young Albus in front of them.

"NOOO! Please!" Al tried to fight it, he really did, but the force of two wands was just to strong.

"I think it finally worked, Teddy my man," grinned Rose evilly.(which is an image you cannot picture with Rose)

Teddy gave a cold murderous laugh, "MUHAHAHA! Shall we test it out in the...common room_...and trash the room, including your time-turner"_

_**End Flashback**_

"Hang on, I never got to finish my story!" Complained James. "So as I was _saying..."_

_**Continuing Flashback**_

"No! Teddy, please, I beg of you to stop!" Pleaded James. "Stop! Oh please stop this vicious cruelty, dear godbrother. Please!"

Begrudgingly, Teddy stopped his violent assault with the pillow and got off James.

"I'm not coming with you, you prat! Go eat crap!"

"Very well, I respect and honor your decision," James' voice cracked

Teddy turned back around and James went to the common room to give Rose the time-turner doing this wonderful task. He stopped when he saw his sister and brother "Why hello sibling! How are you? Would you care to help me give Rose her time-turner?"

"Actually," said Al, "When he heard about it, we were going to smash it."

Just then. Teddy kicked the doors open dramatically. "Great idea, Al, but I want to be the one to do it. He said before Teddy snatched the time-turner out of his godbrothers hand and throwing it violently to the ground, smashing it in the process

"No!" cried James in agony, "That was Roses!"

_**End Flashback**_

"And _that's _what happened," he finished. By this point Teddy was absolutely livid and Lily had to grip his arm to remind him not to do anything drastic.

Sirius was snickering in his hand as he knew it was a made-up story as did everyone else did in the room. Snape was looking livid. Tonks was attempting to keep a straight face but failing miserably as he hair was turning red at her effects and looked like she was smirking. Remus was laughing quitly. Molly looked amused as she had a small smile on her, even though she was trying to look stern

Proffesor Snape spoke up. "Potter!" (it sounded foreign to everyone when Snape addressed them as this) "I find this hard to believe... _and _your story is a bit... er how to put this... far-fetched

For the first time in everyones lives they actually agreed, they nodded

James and Al blushed over the glare that Snape sent. As everyone else was attempting to hide their laughter

"Er..." Al stuttered "Maybee"

Sirius snorted. He found all this _really _amusing.

Dumbledore sighed. "The _real _story if you please"

James piped up "Well..." He drawled once again, as everyone could see his brain working thinking off another made-up story

Dumbledore spoke up "_From _Mr Lupin" It almost sounded like desperatation and pleading in his tone.

Remus froze for a second at Teddy being addressed as this before relaxing and sipping his tea. Sirius smiled.

Lily told the first bit of the story as Teddy wasn't there for that part(James and Al offered to tell it instead but the offer was quickly shot down)

_**Flashback**_

_James stormed off to the Griffindor, gloomingly. Once entering the portrait door, he callopsed onto the couch, there was no one in here except Hugo, Lily, Albus who was sitting in a corner talking, they merely glanced at James when he walked in, and the Head Boy_

_The head boy walked up to James and handed out his hand with an evelope in his hand " James Potter?" James nodded "Look can you give this envelope to your cousin, Rose Weasley, it's about a time-turner, I would give it to her but I can't find her anywhere! Sooo... can you?"_

_"Sure" James took the envelope_

_"Thanks mate" the head boy exited the room leaving James, Lily, Hugo, and Albus alone in the common room_

_James jumped up, fumbling with the envope, ripped, it open, now with the time-turner in his hands, attempted to figure it out. Lily, Hugo, and Albus, who heads snapped up as soon as they heard the words "Time-turner" "Give to Rose", jumped out of their seats towards James_

_"No, James!" Lily pleaded_

_"Don't do anything reckless!" Al begged_

_"Give us the time turner, James!" Hugo shouted_

_Hugo, Lily and Al both said this at the same time so James had no idea what they said, but said anyway " I have to, it make my Jennykins HAPPY!"_

_"What!" Al, Hugo and Lily questioned obviously confused_

After that Teddy took over

_The sound the of the portrait door opened, and Teddy and Rose walked in_

_"Hey!" they both said at the same time_

_"James, McGonagal wanted me to tell you that your detention is today at 6, since she forgot to tell you this morning" Teddy said_

_But no one was listening, Rose was staring at the time-turner in James' hands_

_"No, James give me that! NOW!" she shouted_

_"No!" James shouted back and made a leg for it to the 5th year boys dormitory, but Rose was too fast and slammed into James and they both fell to the floor, having a tug-of-war over the time tirner, there was shouts and screams heard as Lily, Hugo, and Al was shouting to "STOP IT, GET OFF EACH OTHER NOW!" and Teddy shouting " WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!" and Rose and James both shouting " GIVE IT TO ME, DROP IT NOW!"_

_James and Rose both loosened their grip on the time-turner but both still had their grip on it, fighting over it_

_"JAMES, DROP IT, NOW!"_

_"NOO, YOU DROP IT"_

_"YOU" she screeched_

_"I CAN EASILY MAKE YOU DROP IT YOU KNOW, I FOUND THIS FORBIDDEN SPELL THAT MAKE ANYONE DROP ANYTHING AT ALL SO I CAN JUS-"_

_"DON'T YOU DARE! IT'S A FORBIDDEN SPELL, AND LET GO OF THE TIME TURNER NOW!"_

_Lily was attempting to pull James off Rose and Hugo was attempting to pull Rose off James, Al and Teddy stood behind them gaping like a fish, like idiots. With Lily and Hugo pulling at James and Rose, they both released the object with one hand, therefore, only one hand grabbing onto it._

_James with his free hand, pulled out his want and shouted the forbidden spell, aiming for Rose's hand, making her drop it, but his aim was a bit off with the pushing and shoving and hit his hand as well therefore resulting in James and Rose releasing their grip on it at the same time, dropping it, but with the sudden movement, the chain containing the time-turner snapped sending the time-turner flying across the room_

_*SMASH*_

_All sudden movement stopped, staring at it as if their life depended on it. The golden sand was pouring out of it and then the room started to turn gold and the black since the lights turned off._

_"WHATS HAPPENING!" Rose shouted_

_"WHY'S IT GONE DARK!" Al Shouted_

_"WHAT THE- WAIT, WHAT?" James stopped realising what Al said "AWWWW, IS MY ICKLE LITTLE BROTHER AL SCARED OF THE DARK, AWWWWW WANT A HUG FROM YOUR BIG BROTHER JAMES! SOO CUT-..."_

_"ARGH, PISS OFF, JAMES!" Al shouted, annoyed_

_"BUT WHY HAS IT GONE DARK?" Hugo asked_

_"AWWW, IS HUGO SCARED AS WELL OF THE DARK, DO YOU WANT A HUG, DO YOU WANT YOUR BIG SISTER ROSE TO GIVE YOU A HUG-! James coed, jokingly_

_"SHUT UP!" Rose, Al, Hugo, Lily, Teddy shouted_

_"I'M SCARED!" LIly shouted_

_"LILY! COME HERE" James shouted. Lily obeyed following James voice and bumped into him, James put his arms around Lliy, hugging her, keeping her calm_

_" OH YEAH, DON'T TEASE LILY, BUT WHEN IT'S HUGO OR ME YOU SKITT AND TEASE US, DON'T YOU" Al said sarcasticely_

_"YEAH!" Hugo agreed. Rose and Teddy rolled their eyes in the dark, clearly getting annoyed_

_"THAT'S DIFFERENT, I ACTUALLY LIKE LILY UNLIKE YOU TWO SOPPY BABIES WHO-"_

_""SHUT UP!" Rose yelled_

_"SHUT THE HELL UP!" Teddy yelled_

_Then the next second, they started becoming transparent and then James, Al, Lily, Rose, Hugo and Teddy vanished like they were apparating._

_**End Flashback**_

After Lily and Teddy told the story, everyone in deep thought. It was silent for a moment

"Wait... who's 'Jennykins'!" Sirius piped up

The future gen smirked except James who blushed

"Jenny Skater" Hugo informed him

"James crush since his second year" Lily finished

Sirius smiled happily

"She a red-head?" He asked

"Yeah, why?" James asked

"Potter tradition, that. Every Potter falls in live with a red-head. Been going on for generations!" Sirius explained

James brightened up "Reaally!" He then had a love-strick grin on his face

Sirius, Remus, Tonks and Molly laughed at that

Rose kicked James snapping him out of his trance. "We'll go about this later. So what's going to happen..."

xHPx

After a lot of debating and arguments it was finally agreed that they cannot tell Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny who they are as the results could be disastourous as telling them who they end up with, believe it or not, could prevent the kid's birth.

They also oblivaited Tonks and Remus' memory a bit that they wouldn't know who's parents Teddy's are. Teddy doesn't get born for another two years but just to be safe as something in this year could happen between Remus and Tonk's to bring them closer but might not happen. Just to be safe.

Dumbledore had also spoke to Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny in person(Dumbledore had avoided to look at Harry much to Harry's anger) to tell them they can go back to Grimmauld place tommorow which the Harry, Ron and Ginny agreed to in a flash(Hermione wasn't sure). The four of them can't know who the kid's are but felt that they should meet them. It was unknown for long for.

Not that they were arguing (apart from Hermione as she thinks it's missing out out on 'precious O. studies') but Dumbledore had assured them that it'll be fine and he'll give books and private tutors much to Hermione's pleasurement and Harry and Ron's disapointment which caused the two of them to glare at her. Ginny wouldn't of have to to attend as she's a fourth year but Hermione had assured Ginny that it'll be good revision for next year much to her annoyment. Harry and Ron were dumbstruck as Ginny has over a year to prepare for that.

James, Al and Hugo were sharing Harry and Ron's room in Grimmauld place. Lily and Rose were sharing Hermione and Ginny's. Teddy will have to share Sirius' when Harry and Ron arrive as there would be no more room in the guy's room.

As of now, everyone was excited for the next day to come. They were much happier learning about the kids, and they would be much happier when Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny will arrive.

**Hey, hope you liked it. Sorry I took so long to update. At the last last chapter it felt a bit forced, but at this one I actually enjoyed it more. Please review but if you don't like it can you please be nice about it :) xxxxxxxx**


	13. Meeting the teenage parents, OWLs, Occ

**Meeting the teenage parents, O., Occlumency and Magic**

It was decided that Molly and Arthur(Arthur got told on what was going on by Molly, who was amazed and happy about it) to get the teenagers from the station. Sirius offered to go but that offer was shot down quickly. As so they stepped through they were all greeting together excitingly. Harry was immeditely strangled by his godfather in a bone-crushing hug to which he laughed at before hugging back. After a while they they noticed the future gen to which Hermione asked about

"Um.. Tonks who are these people?" Hermione asked with a glance to the 6 kids who stood in the doorway

"Oh right" Tonks said looking at the future gen as well "Well ain't you gonna introduce yourselves?" She asked, turning her back on Hermione to walk back to the kitchen by the nervous looking adults that they would give something away

"Use fake surnames" Tonks hissed to the to which they nodded to, understanding

Hugo walked up to them first followed by Lily, Rose, Al and James.

"Hi there!" Hugo chirped cheerfully " I'm Hugo. Hugo Wea...Weatley" Hugo created in his head using the fake surname James used as joke before

James smirked at this but it wasn't in an arragont way but in a appreciatation way

Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny nodded at this all of them muttering loudly "Nice to meet you"

"And I'm Rose Weatley... his older sister" Rose explained

"And I'm..." James started with mischeaviness in his brown eyes that he inherited from his mother Ginny, smirking at his sibling Lily and Al

Lily and Al sweatdropped, they both know that look a little but too well...

"James Pooper!" He finished

James had to refrain himself from laughing out loud as everybodys reaction were hilliourous to his opinion

Hermione's eyebrows shot up in amusement even though she was trying not to. Ron snorted. Harry smiled in a way that he hoped that was polite, and Ginny was trying to fight off her laughter but failing miserably.

Al and Lily glared at their brother whilst Teddy, Hugo and Rose rolled their eyes, smiling

Sirius stuffed his fist in his mouth so he wouldn't burst out laughing as he knows how serious the situation is and as Molly had shot him a look

"Pooper?" Ron asked "Really?"

Hermione smacked him on the arm hissing "_Ron_!" to which he hissed back "_What_?"

Harry rolled his eyes in annoyment as he was sick of their bickering, _all the time_ .They weren't bickering now but Harry's temper is so short this year

"Yep" James replied "Name is James Pooper" he repeated

"We can always pretend that James isn't our brother" Al whispered to his sister to which she nodded to

"And these two are by brother and sister!" James finished, to which James flashed the both of them a smile mockingly sweet

Al and Lily glared at him once again, they both sighed

"Lily... Pooper" she said grudgingly, shooting James a look

"Al Pooper"

"The three of us are 'The poopers'" James joked

Everyone except Al and Lily snorted

"And I'm Teddy... Poopin" Teddy introduced lamely, cursing himself for using a fake surname that James joked about as well

James once again smirked, and everyone apart from Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny snorted once again

Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny's eyebrows shot up but didn't comment and all muttered loudly "Nice to meet you"

"I'm Ron Weasley"

"Ginny Weasley"

"Hermione Granger"

"Nice to meet you" The future gen say

Everybody glanced at Harry waiting for him to introduce himself, but he wasn't paying attention anymore he was looking at the wall, spaced out, obvously lost in his own world

Snape snorted "Too aragont that he thinks that everybody knows who he is, just like his father" he grumbled. Sirius shot him a dirty look

"Harry! Harry!" Molly shouted attempting to snap him out off it

He shook his head "What?" glancing around. "Oh.. right... sorry" he grinned sheepishly

"I'm Harry-"

"Potter. Harry Potter" James finished, smiling at his father

But Harry wasn't smiling, he had a look in those brilliant green eyes that he couldn't place.

In a toneless tone says "Yeah well that's my name don't wear it out"

That was James' joke. Whenever says 'James Potter', James usually replies jokingly 'Yeah well that's my name don't wear it out' but Harry said it in a bored, irrated, fed-up tone.

Everybody was taken back but didn't comment.

James didn't understand. In the future that was what they did. His father complained in the last summer jokingly that he can't remember the last time he introduced to himself without someone finishing it for him(the wizarding world obviously) To which James joked about and said he'll do it for him then to which his father rolled his eyes mockingly, laughing.

Realising now James missed his father from the future, he didn't like pretending to his parents, aunt and uncles. Gratefully his grandparents know who they are though.

Tonks cleared her throat "Right well, shall we go on to the kitchen"

Everybody agreed, talking loudly.

Oddly enough everybody sat in couples.(starts from the left) Ron sat by Hermione. Harry by Ginny. Molly by Arthur and Remus by Tonks.

As Sirius, Snape and Dumbledore weren't with anyone, Sirius sat by his cousing, Tonks, Dumbledore by Sirius and Snape at the right of Dumbledore. The future gen sat at the other side of the table( as it would off been a straight line)

Silence. It was silent as everyone glanced at everyone taking it all in

Hermione interupted the silence. "Now I still want to know how we're going to revise for our O."

Harry, Ron and Ginny groaned, the three of them avoiding the temptation to bang their heads against the table

Everybody laughed

"Hermione. My O... are _NEXT YEAR_!" Ginny shrieked

Everybody snorted. _Typical Hermione_

"It _will _be good revision" Hermione shot back

"Again. I go back to... my O. are _NEXT YEAR!_" Ginny shouted again

By now Harry and Ron were literally banging their heads against the table repeadingly, much to the amusement to everyone else. They would definately be getting a hedache later

"Well-" Hermione started, but whatever Hermione was going to say was cut off after Harry who suddenly stopped banging his against the table shot up, interupting her.

"Wait a second!" Harry shouted, his hand on his head to stop the pounding rush from his blood which was from the banging his head on the table, the look on his as if he got told christmas was coming early. Unknown to everyone apart from Ron and Hermione that Harry had never looked forward to Christmas

Hermione glared at him for being interupted. Ginny sent Harry a silent 'thank-you' and Ron his head still on the table, looking lazily at his best friend pleading with him silently to distract Hermione to talk about _school work._

"Can we use magic? I mean it's not the summer or easter holidays, so... would we be able to?" Harry finished excitingly, looking at Dumbledore happily (to which Dumbledore was avoiding to look at Harry which caused Harry's excitement to lower a bit)

Ron, Ginny and Hermione were looking hopeful as well, lookin at Dumbledore as well

Dumbledore smiled, deciding to look at Ron, Hermione and Ginny, ignoring Harry.

"Yes, you can. As the four of you are supposed to be in Hogwarts. I mean whenever you go to Hogsmeade you can so I don't see the difference" He replied

"YES!" They cheered happily

The adults laughed, shaking their heads

"This is fantastic"

"Great!"

"No more chores at last! Can just use magic!"

"Don't have to move to get stuff!"

"We can pull pranks!"

"Harry!" Dumbledore shouted, causing the four of them to stop cheering and the adults to stop laughing at their reactions

"Yes?" Harry asked, confused as the headmaster has been avoiding him as much as possible since summer.

"You will still have to take occlumency lessons"

This confused the future gen hugely as they they had no idea what occlu-what lessons were

Harry was silent

"Oh" He finally replied, all traces of amusement gone, emotionless

This sent a shiver up everyones spine from his tone. How could your emotions change that fast? A second ago he was laughing now he sounds pissed off.

"It is crucial, to prevent the link from Lord Voldemort, Severus will be here every couple of day to teach you" Dumbledore finished, taking a particular interest on the cabinets, avoiding Harry's eyes annoying him greatly

Harry's blood boiled, clenching his fists. "Fine!" he said coldly. Before turning on his heel muttering loudly and swearing under his breathe. "I'm going to bed"

"It's 4 o'clock-" Ron protested before he recieved a cold glare from Harry shutting him up, before storming out the room

Everybody was surprised at his sudden mood swings before they heard a loud slam nearly giving everybody heart-attacks

"Right, well" Arthur started

Sirius looked at the ceiling worringly, concerned for his godson

"Dinner?" Molly offered, trying to get rid of the akward silence

Everyone nodded

"Where am I going to sleep, now. Harry seems to be having one of his moods, _once again_" Ron muttered loudly, half-jokingly

Hermione hit his arm causing him to yelp, much to everyone's amusment. But what concerned everyone was the _'once again' _part.

"Albus?" Snape spoke up

Al jumped as that is his name as well, before realising that he was talking to Dumbledore, but this didn't go unoticed by Remus who raised his eyebrows, Al shrugged at him, smiling

Dumbledore hummed as if telling Snape to go on

"Shall I give Potter a lesson now, as with the _children_ now here"

Ron, Hermione and Ginny looked confused as they all know when he said 'childen' that they meant the future gen but was wondaring what was special about them to prevent Voldemort learning about them

Dumbledore thought about it for a while, stroking his beard. "Yes... just in case" he finally replied

Snape nodded and took off after the teenager

It suddenly became silent

"Chess anyone?" Ron asked once the silence became to much

Hugo nodded excitingly and Ron went to get the chess board which he had in his trunk that he left downstairs.

**What did you think? I know Harry seems a bit angry, but that's the thing, Whenever people write about the future gen going to Harry's fith year they seem to forget about this. I know in this story Harry seems a bit too angry. Does anyone have any ideas what I could do, I need some ideas. It'll probably take me a while to write another chapter as I need some inspiration. Please review. :) xxxx **


	14. Chapters? this isn't part of the story

**Hey this is a draft of the future chapters. It literally took me two second to do this. I probably WILL change things or not do any of these but I would love to know your opinions. I know the chapters sound sort of crappy but IT DID take me 2 SECONDS TO DO. **

14- Harry's suspiciouns and Hugo beats Ron at chess

15- Who dies?

16- James and Al's prank

17- Albus Severus Potter

18- Harry discovers he sleepwalks

19- Time- turner investigations

20- Hermione discovers the truth

21- Sirius and James have a blast

22- Lily accidently calls Harry 'Dad'

23- I must not tell lies

24- Harry's hormones

25- Harry and Ginny accidently kiss and Sirius walk in on them

26- Harry and Ginny blackmail Sirius

27- Harry's father, a bully?

28- Hermione's theory

29- Harry accidently interupts a moment between Ron and Hermione

30- James Sirius Potter, homesick? No way!

31- Al and Sirius have a chat

32- the future?

33- James walks in on Tonks and Remus

34- James claims his eyes are 'burning' as he walked in on Tonks and Remus

35- where Sirius find everything hilliurous

36- the Harry Potter movies! What?

37- Harry, Ron, Hermione's and Ginny's fury

38- The philoshiphers stone

39- The chamber of secrets

40- The prisoner of azkaban

41- The goblet of fire

42- The order of the phoenix

43- The half-blood prince

44- The deathly Hallows Part 1

45- The deathly Hallows Part 2


	15. Harry's Suspicions and Hugo beats Ron a

**Harry's Suspicions and Hugo Beats Ron at Chess**

**Harry's POV**

As Harry lied on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, trying to calm himself down, he thought about the kids who had come here today but couldn't help wondering. _Why?_

Why were they here, for Dumbledore and the others to trust them enough to let them stay in grimmauld place, the location of Order of the Phoenix. For all we know they could be Death Eaters in disguise to spy on the Order, they are a bit young but you never know, stranger things has happened in the world.

They had ridicolous surnames. _Pooper, Poopin. _Are they serious, how stupid do they think he is to fall for that, he saw the look of mischevenous in that kid's eyes when he grinned at his brother and sister. Wasn't his name James or Jamie or something like that, Harry shook his head to try and shake the coming migrane he felt coming and something prickling into his mind which Harry knew to well to be Voldemort by now. Sure '_Wheatly'_ was believable but he had an odd feeling.

Harry sighed and knew that he'll have to be careful of them while they stay here, Harry still wasn't sure why he, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny had to stay here in the first place. He was also confused as why Ginny is here though, not that he's complaining but it always been him, Ron and Hermione... not Ginny as well. Why not Fred or George as well.

Harry was shook out of his thoughts when he heard footsteps coming up to the room and he couldn't help thinking angrily. _Why can't they just leave me alone!_

The opened, and Harry was unfortunately met with the face with Snape. _Oh god, anyone but him!_ He groaned

"Potter! It is now time for you occlumency lesson" Snape snarled

Harry couldn't help thinking. _Gee not even a 'hello'_. He thought dryly

"Now? In here?" Harry questioned back, trying to keep the anger away from his tone as knowing Snape he'll give a detention once he gets back to school

"Yes, right now" He snapped back apparantly noticing that Harry is indeed in a bad mood "But not in here, we'll go to another room. Follow me!" He cammanded and turned on his heel and walked out the room.

Harry sighed, got up from his bed and followed after him, not looking forward to the next hour or so.

**Sirius' POV**

Sirius watched as Hugo volunteered to play chess with his future father, happily and the grin that appeared on Ron's face as he set up the chess board. And when Dumbledore excused himself out.

Turning his head to look at Hermione, he noticed there was a worried and curious expression on her face as she chewed on her bottom lip obviously thinking about something. The animagious couldn't help but think why, was it about Harry, Ron or even the kids from the future. She looked suspicious about something and Sirius knew that wasn't a good thing, he would just have to hope she's not suspicious about the future gen as they all agreed, it could prevent their birth. Yes, Hermione was smart but he wasn't sure about this.

Sirius was shook out of his thoughts by James, Harry and Ginny's eldest loudly asked a question.

"Hey, whats occl... whatever?" James questioned out loud

It was Tonks who answered

"Well you know how Voldemort is looking into Harry's mind?"

James' blank expression told her he didn't and she continued

"Well apparantly there is a connection between them somewhow which allows Voldemort to look into your fath- Harry's mind, into his memories and that"

Sirius inwardly cringed at the slip-up Tonks nearly mind, and he glanced around to see if anyone else noticed.

Remus and Arthur were having a conversation of their own and appeared to noticed-but then again wouldn't really matter if they did. He looked at Molly and noticed she also noticed as she had a stricken-horrified expression on her face, Ron and Hugo were to busy playing chess and Ginny appeared to have not noticed anything. The future gen looked as if they were holding their breathes glancing at Ron, Hermione and Ginny hopefully. But Hermione had a look on her face that told Sirius that she noticed and he cringed again, cursing in his mind. _Great_

Tonks carried on explaining

"So you know that could be dangerous, so we got Snape to to teach Harry Occlumency, which is when you block your mind so that he can't look into his mind-"

"Oh I get it" James interupted, grinning, giving he a thumbs up to which Tonks grinned back to him.

Sirius couldn't help but think he was so like his grandfather, James Potter. Sirius grinned at the word _grandfather_, and couldn't help but feel old. Sirius still hadn't got used to the fact that these kids are from the future

Sirius glanced at Ginny who who's hand was propped on the table with her head on top, look bored. Potter's really do end up with red-head's, he didn't believe it at first when Jame's parents, Harry's grandparents told him but they managed to convnince him. But just because her hair colour is the same as all the generations, doesn't mean that they look the same. Ginny didn't look like Lily, Harry's mother, which is a good thing because Sirius would find it creepy if you ended up with someone who looks like their mother, regardless if that person knew his mother at all.

The animagous was happy for them both, he was dying to tease them both but knew he couldn't which was absolute turtore for him. Before Remus and Tonks had their memories altered, Sirius teased them both endlessly, annoying them in the process. He only did that after he got told their memoreis would be altered as Sirius knew his best friend, Remus very well even after all these years he hasn't changed that much.

Remus had never had much self-confidence in himself, Sirius remembered himself and James frequently having to convince, and push Remus to do stuff he wanted to do but never believed he could, and if it didn't work out, he and James would storm to whatever it was demanding why and to let him do so. Moony had just believed that because he is a werewolf he shouldn't get a chance but Sirius and James always rolled our eyes at and told him he's being ridicolous. Thinking back now, Sirius smirked

Sirius was shook out of his thought when Hugo started cheering

"I WON! I WON! YESSS!" Hugo cheered happily, jumping up and down, smirking at his fathers gobsmacked expression on his face

"Unbelievable!" Ron shouted, laughing at Hugo's victory dance. " No one's been able to beat me at chess, I mean, Harry's been trying to beat me for the past 5 years but never did... but then again he's always been rubbish at chess"

"_Ron!_" Hermione hissed, glaring at him for insulting Harry's chess 'skills', which Sirius laughed at.

As Sirius watched all this, smiling, he couldn't but help to he wish that things could stay like this forever


	16. Who Dies?

**Who Dies?**

While Hugo celebrated his victory at defeating Ron at chess: Ron Hermione and Ginny excused themselves and went to bed while the future gen, Sirius, Remus, Molly and Tonks resumed to sitting on the couch bored out of their minds thinking what to do for who knows how long. Fortunately or unfortunately depending how you look at it, James suddenly came to a realisation.

"Oh no this is devastating!" James said dramatically

"What is?" Lily asked

"The only reason I used that time turner was to prevent shag..." James trailed off at the look on his grandmother's face

Everyone stared at him, waiting

"...something. But I went too far back!"

"Huh?"

"I was supposed to use it just to go back like six hours but instead we're in 1996... Unless"

"Unless what"

"I wait for it to happen in this timeline!" He exclaimed happily, jumping up from the couch

"Wait... so you going to wait for like 20 years?" Hugo said deadpanned

"Yes!"

Everyone stared blankly at him

"..."

"..."

"...What!?" Rose exclaimed unbelievably

"..."

"And people call me crazy" Sirius muttered to himself

"...Great! Now I'm bored to death again" Al complained

"Well you're going to be bored for another 20 odd years" James told him

"Huh? Why?"

"Because the both of us are going to be waiting in this time line for our current time line"

"...Why?"

"Jenny Skater!" James happily said as if that explained everything

"James! I'm not waiting for 20 bloody years just for your idiotic reasons!" Al told him furiously

"Hey!" James protested

"Enough!" Rose shouted over the both of them "Sorry to say this, Jamie but I have to agree with Al about this"

"What? Why?"

"Do I need to explain why" Rose said sarcastically

"Yes!"

"..."

"James, I was being sarcastic"

"...Oh! But I don't see why we can't"

Everyone groaned

"Just my luck, I'm stuck in 1996 with an idiotic moron, who said moron is the reason why we're here in the first place, in a room with people who are dead in my time line and I'm bored to death!" Al muttered loudly angrily, looking at the ground.

Everyone apart from Al froze

"... What did you just say?" Remus asked quietly

"What?" Al asked, raising his head to look at the Remus

"You said 'in a room with people who are dead in my time line'" Sirius quoted

Al froze

"...Er...I...I...I meant..." Al stuttered, his face paling, panicking

"... So some of us are dead in your time line?" Tonks said quietly

Al realising that there is no way for him to take back the words, nodded gravely.

"Who?" Remus asks

The future gen stared at him with a depressed look on their faces

"We will try our best not to prevent it" Tonks stated

The future gen looked at each other, nodding

James cleared his throat that had suddenly closed up, now serious

"Remus Lupin"

Everyone looked horrified at the news that he will no longer be here, but Sirius looked the most upset at the news that his last best friend will soon die, just when he started a family as well.

"Sirius Black"

If possible they looked even more upset at this news, just when he finally go out of Azkaban and could have turned his life around.

Noticing everyone's faces, James sped it up

"Tonks, Dumbledore and others"

Everyone was silent taking it all in, some of them we crying or trying their best not to.

"Oh" Molly stated not knowing what to say

When does it happen?" Sirius asks quietly

"Er... well Remus died during the Battle of Hogwarts" Lily informed

"Battle of Hogwarts?"

"Oh crap! Just ignore that!"

"So there's going to be a war in Hogwarts!" Tonks stated

"NO!" Lily attempted to deny

"Just give it up, Lily. There's no point" Hugo told her

Lily nodded, guiltily

James continued "So did Tonks while with Remus which was 1999 I think"

The people originally from 1996 nodded.

"Dumbledore... 1997"

"But that's next year!"

"Yeah I know. But he comes back to life"

"How could the strongest wizard of all time d... What?"

"I said he comes back to life"

"...How?"

"I have no idea, he's alive in our time line which is highly confusing but he apparently died in 1997"

"...Are you sure?"

"Yes. We tried asking him how he's back alive but he didn't say anything so everyone gave up asking him"

"Wow. That is highly confusing like you said"

"I know"

"..."

"Right so I think that's all of whom you asked about"

_*ahem* _"Well I believe your missing someone" Sirius glared

"Really? Who?" James asked stupidly

"Oh I don't know, dark hair, dark eyes, dashing good looks"

"..."

"... Cedric Diggory" Lily cut in

Everyone stared at her

"What? I saw a picture in the newspaper when I came here and I must say he is hot" She blushed

"..."

Sirius shook his head, sighing. "No! I was referring to me you trollop!"

Everyone stared blankly at him

"...I don't understand" Teddy dumbstruck

Sirius sighed annoyed and said slowly, gritting through his teeth as if speaking to two year olds. "You. Didn't. Tell. Me. What. Happens. To. ME!"

"...Didn't we?"

"NO!"

"Geez okay calm down!" James quickly said, throwing his arm up as if to show him he's unarmed and before Sirius will truly become a murderer. "_Drama queen_" he muttered quietly to him but apparently not quite enough

"What was that?"

"Nothing!"

"Didn't sound like 'nothing' to me"

James quickly moved on, changing the subject

"Sirius... this year"

Everyone looked horrified once again, the slight cheery mode disappearing completely

"WHAT! I die this year!?" Sirius said horrified, paling. All anger disappearing quickly.

"Yes, in that department of prophecies or whatever it's called"

"I die there? What was I doing there?"

"...I can't tell you there but..." James wanting to brighten up the situation slightly tried to make a joke

"You died from a curtain" He stated

"This is horrible...wait...WHAT! A CURTAIN!"

"Yes!"

Remus snickered also seeing James' attempt to make a joke, joined in.

"Ha ha ha, oh my. The great Sirius Black getting killed by drapery... how tragic"

"Shut it, Moony!"

Tonks joining in. "So did you trip over a curtain or something along those lines?"

"What! NO!"

"How do you know? It hasn't happened yet"

"You could say... you took the veil!"

"That's not funny"

"I disagree"

"And here you said the day you die it was going to be in an amazing way but unfortunately 'The Curtain' had other ideas"

"Oh ha ha! Very amusing! Hilarious!" Sirius said sarcastically

"I know!"

"I was being sarcastic!"

"I know"

"I... what?"

"What?"

"..."

"..."

"Nothing, so moving on"

"...Right"

"I shall get my revenge!" Sirius announced

"..."

"For what?" Tonks cut in

Sirius ignored him " James! My great god-son!"

"Sirius! I don't even think 'great god-son' is a real thing!" Tonks protested

Sirius ignored her again

"Yeah?" James said

"I need your brilliant pranking skills to get revenge!" He declared

"Why?" Tonks once again asked but was ignored once again

James face brightened up immediately "Sure!"

**Hope you like this chapter and please review! They make me update faster! **


	17. James, Al's and Sirius' Prank Part One

**James, Al's and Sirius' Prank Part One**

"So how are we going to do this prank" Sirius asked James that next morning while eating breakfast. Sirius, James and Al were the only actual ones awake yet and the three of them were sitting at the table eating cereal

"Er... well, wait Al do you want to join in" James asked

"NO!" Al shouted, wide-awake now as he was pretty much half-dead a second now

Sirius blinked and James seemed unfazed

"Why not" James whined

"Do you not remember the last time I pulled a prank with you" Al said through gritted teeth

**Flashback**

"Hurry the common room is this way"

"So how do we get in?" James asked

"Er... well look there, someone has left the door open"

"Wait, that is too obvious! It might be a trap" James exclaimed

"I'm sure it's fine, some idiot probably just forgot to close the door" Al sighed

"But we are supposed to be doing a super ultra spy sneaking mission, we're supposed to get in an awesome way! Like somehow getting on the ceiling of the common room and use that laser thing in the shape of a square so there'll be a square hole, then tie rope on to one our bodies while the other lowers that said tied person slowly down"

Al sighed heavily "How am I related to you?" He asked himself and proceeded to just simply opening the door wider and walking in

"Wait!" James shouted running after him

While walking through the entrance to the common room James was jumping from shadow to shadow cat-like, hiding behind object to object to hide himself from plain view, Albus was just simply walking uncaring and snatched up a wallet from the floor that someone had lost, counting the money and stuffing it into his jean pockets and a bertie botts flavoured beans opening it then munching on it.

After a ridiculous amount of time to get in the actual room which Albus was seriously considering jumping out the window that just happened to be there to get away from his idiotic brother's antics but managed to refrain himself from doing so.

"Yes, we are in the Slytherins common room" James cheered

"Finally" Al muttered happily

"Now where is Scorpious' room?"

"How am I supposed to know? But he is in the year below you so he should be in the fourth years somewhere"

Both brothers then walked towards a sign that said 'Fourth years' then went through the door

"...Wait where all the Slytherins?" Al asked

"Well it is Slytherin VS Ravenclaw so guessing they are all watching it and the others somewhere else or they just don't care that there are two random Gryfindors in their common room" James shrugged

"Huh that's strange, obsessed much wouldn't you say"

"Hmm, so this prank have sneaking involved" James asked

"Er... yes, I guess"

So as James had called it a supposedly 'sneaking mission' as how James had put it, James had started he had started singing his 'own personal' spy music which isn't really personal since James was singing the batman one but moving on as Al thought he would get a further migraine to just explain this to him

James and Al walked into the fourth year common for the boys, and after five minutes managed to find the room where Scorpious Malfoy stays

"Aha! The Batman Cave!" James exclaimed happily

"Do I even want to know" Al sighed once again, deciding to ignore him

"My God... are you seeing this or do I need to wear glasses?" James asked, blinking

"I know yeah, this guy is even vainer then you and that is saying something!" Al exclaimed

"I know- wait... HEY!"

"Shhh, you're going to blow our cover"

Scorpious Malfoy in the area of where he sleeps had portraits and pictures of himself everywhere hanging on the wall but since you don't really get that much space were crammed in more making it looking like he had more pictures then it should do.

Al and James both grinned both sharing the same look of mischievous

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Al asked

"Hell yeah" In five seconds flat swiping out two marker pen out of his pocket- which for unexplained reasons of why he is carrying it in the first place

**10 minutes later...**

"GET IT OFF!" Al growled angrily

After the both had them had doodled on all of his pictures, giving him boobs for pictures that were viewed out enough to see his chest, some of them drawing a belly to look like Scorpious was pregnant, funny looking moustaches and beards, skirts instead of pants, weird looking hairdo's, some of them having speech bubbles to make it look like Scorpious was saying stuff like "I am an idiot" " I am secretly a girl" "I wax my legs" "I am having a secret romantic relationship with a poster of a dragon" " I love Hugo Weasley" and other random stuff.

It was all perfect except for one thing well at least in Al's opinion. In big massive letters standing out the most was **"Looking for a good time *wink wink*, call** (insert number)**"**

It was perfectly except for one small detail that was Albus' number

"Why? You see when he calls that number looking for a good time *wink wink* he will be getting _you_ instead! It'll be hilarious!" James snickered

Al didn't know if he supposed to be offended but was too angry at the moment to think about it "GET IT OFF NOW! I don't want that idiot having my number!"

"Fine. I'll give him Rose's number instead then" James sighed, scribbling out Al's number and writing Rose's instead. "It's not like you use it anyway"

It was true, all the Potter and Weasley children had all gotten mobile phones for Christmas from their Grandfather Arthur Weasley for unexplained reasons but they have proved useful a couple of times even though James, Lily and Hugo were the only ones who actually use it.

"All right, let's get out of here" Al said satisfied that it was no longer his number on the wall and was hoping that Scorpious won't actually call that number as he didn't think Rose would be very impressed.

"Okay, remember we have to sneak our way out of here being as quite as possible" James stated, staying still for a moment.

Then he proceeded to run like hell, running into pretty much everything, smashing objects and possibly making as much sound as possible the complete opposite of what James had just said and then out of sight

Al stared at the spot his brother was last seen from his sight for a moment and then face-palmed himself following his brother, stepping over the broken glass and objects.

**End Flashback**

"Huh" Sirius blinked

"Uh-huh, see" Al said deadpanned

"See what?" James asked

"Al, have you considered perhaps therapy for your brother" Sirius started off seriously but then snickered

Al burst out laughing

"HEY! Oh ha ha ha, very amusing" James huffed and crossed his arms

"Very mature, James" Al rolled his eyes, turned to Sirius" To be honest, yes many times actually"

Sirius laughed seeing the look on James' face

"So did Malfoy ended up calling that number?" Sirius asked

Al nodded gravely" She was furious, somehow she guessed that us two had something to do with it" he said glaring at James

"It's not my fault, it was funny I didn't mean to burst out laughing" James defended, laughing.

"You didn't have to tell her _**I**_ had something to do with it!" Al cried

"Have _you_ met Rose! I didn't want to deal with her wrath by _myself_!"

Sirius laughed

Al huffed" Still" he muttered

"Right so moving on, what ideas have you got for the prank we could do?" Sirius asked

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

**A.N: Sorry, this is so late and I have been taking forever updating lately but I'm going to try to update more, I'll try and update the next chapter for Wednesday but till then have anyone got any ideas the prank could be, I'll love to hear any ideas. And I been thinking should Albus like anyone to like go out with, aren't sure. Well hope you liked the chapter and please review, until next time bye xx **


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